


Of a Monster and a Man

by CuddleMeister



Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Acceptance, Adult Content, Anal Sex, Conquest Route, Dirty Talk, Fire Emblem: Fates Spoilers, Headcanon, I inadvertantly make odin super extra, M/M, Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-08
Updated: 2018-02-23
Packaged: 2018-12-25 04:15:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 29,170
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12027912
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CuddleMeister/pseuds/CuddleMeister
Summary: All his life, he had been nothing more than a one-eyed street rat with nothing to look forward to but death. That is, until a prince with hair like a sunrise and eyes of scorn took him underwing.My personal take on Niles' journey of reconciliation as a retainer, with a few (quite a few)  liberal touches.





	1. Chapter 1

"What're we waitin' on?"

"That light there. Once it's gone, so are we."

"Takin' too damned long...my legs'll get numb."

"Shuddup, you'll blow our cover...!"

Niles listened to his two companions bicker while he kept watch on a light flickering through a window in the side of Castle Krakenburg. He and his group had managed to sneak past the first round of guards around the castle's border, but it was no easy task. The castle had little cover to use, even for a single person. When a shrub or tree came into their path, they nearly found themselves fighting over its use. Now the three were tucked uncomfortably inside an open awning right above an entrance into the window beneath. If only the person holding the candle within that window's room would move to a different room long enough for them to slip inside...

"Niles, they still there?"

Niles silently nodded his head, and one of them groaned. He heard a fist connect with the other's arm to shut him up, and the light inside the window began to fade. He held up a hand for their attention, but quickly returned that hand to keeping himself propped up beneath the awning. Despite his strength, keeping his body lifted in such a cramped space took nearly all of his concentration. That, in addition to the focus he gave to keeping watch and keeping silent, was agonizing. But he cherished the burn. It reminded him that he was alive.

The light was gone now. No sound of footsteps or speech, either. Niles mentally counted to ten to make sure their coast was clear, then hissed, "Now! Go!"

The three bandits dropped through the window silently and immediately flanked the door of the chamber on both sides. The smarter of his two companions, a man he had come to know as Biggs, peeked around the chamber door into the hallway. His head quickly emerged from behind the door, and the man whispered a swear.

"Butler moves far too slowly."

"Maybe we can give 'em some help?" suggested the stupider of his two companions.

"Don't be stupid, Wedge. That'll alert more guards."

"Not if we give 'em some coaxing."

"Fine, then, wise guy, you go. Don't get caught, though...!" Wedge was already slipping out into the hallway, and pulling a knife from inside of his cloak. Niles and Biggs watched from the safety of the chamber as Wedge sidled up next to the butler and brandished the knife beneath his chin. The butler gasped, almost dropping his candle, and Wedged gave a comforting "shhh..." before pinning his arms to his waist with his free hand.

"Evenin'," he whispered. "You move awfully slow, don't you? If y'say anything, I'm afraid my knife might just slip. I have a couple questions. I want you to click your tongue once for 'yes,' and twice for 'no,' got it?"

The butler was visibly shaking, but, after a moment of silence, Niles and Biggs heard the man click his tongue once.

"Good man. Now, d'you know where a man like myself can get his hands on some treasure in this side of the castle?" The butler clicked his tongue once. "Ah, great. Why don't you take me there? Remember, not a word...!"

The butler and Wedge began to quietly shuffle down the hall as one. Niles caught a look of skepticism in Biggs' eyes as he and himself slid into the hall and followed. They kept to the walls, glanced behind them often. There existed shadows of maps through connections the bandits shared of the castle's layout, but these maps were created by hearsay, educated guesses, and those lucky enough to have visited or escaped. None of the three actually knew how to navigate these halls, and felt guarded relief that they were able to snag a butler to guide them.

The butler turned down this hall and that. The castle seemed like a labyrinth. Wherever the butler was taking them must have been in the heart of the wing through which they had all entered. But after one final turn through the halls, the butler's attention was brought to something new. Wedge turned pale and swore with enunciation. Niles and Biggs quickly caught sight of Wedge's concern once they had joined up with the other two. The butler had led the three bandits straight to a pair of guards wielding broadswords, and the guards were beginning to make chase. Biggs passed Niles and ran ahead of him with Wedge in the opposite direction. Niles made to catch up, but glanced back at the butler to notice that no harm had come to him. He was sure that Wedge would have cut open the butler's throat out of spite before running, but he hadn't.

The three bandits ran blindly down the halls, trying to find an escape, but it seemed that the butler was no fool. He had led them to a section of the castle without windows as to prevent their escape. The three were able to keep the guards behind them relatively at bay, but they certainly were quick to be adorned in full armor.

A window finally appeared at the end of a long passage, and the three quickened their speed, eager to make their escape. Before they were able to reach this window, however, another guard appeared from inside an alcove in the hall, and reached out to grab them. Wedge shoved Niles into the guard's grasp, and Niles was quickly pinned to the floor.

"Bastards!" he shouted, and was kicked in the side for his outburst by his captor. He watched out of the corner of his good eye as his companions left him. The other two guards continued to give chase, but he knew they would probably escape. The guard above him was binding his wrists as the footfalls of the other two guards continued down the passage. He stopped struggling, which almost seemed to disappoint his captor, as the man jerked him to his feet and shoved him ahead.

The guard guided him at lance-point down more halls still, until they came to a door, and entered. The smell of decay hit him like a frigid gale, and he wretched. He was used to similar smells, but never had he experienced such a powerful smell of degeneration. He was thrust into a prison cell, where he landed on his shoulder. He cried out a sound that made his captor and the jail keep look at each other in disgust. The two of them would have reacted to the fall with agony, but to Niles, the pain was exquisite.

His captor kneeled hesitantly to shackle Niles' ankles to the walls, and closed the barred door behind him. Niles tested his chains once the guard was gone and the jail keep was occupied with another prisoner. He wasn't going to be able to escape this predicament.

 _Guess this means death_ , he thought, and allowed a strange sensation to fill his skull. This sensation only occurred when he pondered his own demise. It felt like his subconsciousness was reaching a door with a lock to which he had the key, but he was still unable to open it, somehow. Sometimes he wondered if the sensation was caused by his lack of knowledge for his place after life, but when he found himself close to the end of his life like this, he allowed the feeling to take its course. Soon he was unconscious, and faintly remembered wondering if he would even wake from his sleep before he passed out.


	2. Chapter 2

Niles awoke to the clamor of steel against steel. He groaned, not in response to the noise, but in slight disappointment that he had awoken at all. The jail keep was rattling his sword between the bars of the cell doors in order to wake everyone from their sleep.

  
"Look alive, delinquents. You all have a special guest today. Show your respects for Prince Leo!"

  
Niles could hear murmuring in his neighboring cells, some voices of reverence, but mostly annoyed shouting and swears. Niles remained still, aside from circling his sore shoulder in its socket. He heard a set of footsteps begin down the aisle. A man clad in dark armor stopped in front of his cell door and turned to face him. Niles sized him up, his high collar, his hair like wheat, his piercing brown eyes.

  
"Are you not the thief who attempted a heist in this wing of the castle last night?" the man asked. Niles snorted. "I am Leo, prince of Nohr. Normally, I'd allow the jail keep to have his way with you, but I have a few questions." Niles was silent, but shrugged. It didn't seem to bother the young man, as he continued, "I was told that you had cohorts. Our men were unable to capture them last night. Do you know to where they might have escaped?"

  
Again, Niles shrugged, but this time he was actually unsure. "There are various locations in which they might have hidden. They likely won't emerge for a few days, however. You'd have to search all of Windmire to find them."

  
"I have a small search party out for their arrest, rest assured. Doesn't matter, though, I suppose. No harm befell our men, and you seem relatively without injury. Still, invading the privacy of this castle is nothing easily forgotten or forgiven. What have you to say for yourself?"

  
Niles lifted his head to look the man directly in the eyes. His gaze was hollow as he muttered, "Kill me."

  
"Beg pardon?"

  
"I want you to kill me. I have no desire to be set free."

  
Leo was silent for a moment. Then his hands made their way behind his back, and he paced leisurely in front of the prison cell.

  
"I could have that arranged, you know," he said. "I'm sure your head would be quite easy to remove with one of my men's axes."

  
"I welcome it! Do it now. Send one of your men in here and relieve me of this head." The same sensation he had experienced the previous night washed over Niles like the warmth of liquor. He felt numb in every other aspect, but this rush was exhilarating. The prospect of his end, the loom of death; he wanted it so badly.

  
"You make it seem like a poor trick," Leo countered, narrowing his eyes at the thief.

  
"Quite the opposite, actually. I've no weapons on me. Your jail keep has them. I am also bound by each of my limbs. No harm can come to your men. So please, I want to feel the axe against my neck."

  
Leo stopped pacing, and asked, "Why?"

  
"I've been alive for far too long, slipped through the fingers of death one too many times. I deserve this. Kill me!" Niles was vaguely aware that he was now begging. He was also aware of the crack entering his voice. He was used to neither of these occurrences, but he no longer cared. Leo was mentally weighing the scenario, and Niles was unable to read his expression. He seemed lost in thought, which almost irritated him.

  
Finally, the jail keep piped up, and said, "What are your commands, Lord Leo?"

  
Leo did not answer immediately, and the keep was about to repeat his question, when Leo cleared his throat. "Bring the prisoner to my courtyard after I am able to summon Odin for assistance." The keep barked an affirmative, and with that, Leo left Niles to wonder what would become of him. The jail keep entered his cell and, after unshackling his ankles, pulled him to his feet and pushed him toward the dungeon's exit. Niles did not feel the push, and stumbled to his knees. The jail keep swore, and nearly threw him out the door. Niles allowed the keep to unleash his frustrations upon him. At least it made the journey outside a blur.  
The day was cloudy, a fitting day for his execution. Perhaps, since he was being led outside, the beheading would be made public, as a scare

tactic to other criminals considering invading Castle Krakenburg. It would be the style of death he deserved. He only wished that he was high enough in spirit to offer a vulgar comment or slur as his last mark on the world.

  
Leo was waiting for Niles and the keep when they reached a grand courtyard behind the castle. At Leo's side was another blonde man in what Niles could only guess was a clown outfit. Leo nodded to the keep, and, to Niles' bewilderment, his binds were taken from his wrists. He looked at Leo, puzzled.

  
"Please choose a weapon, rogue," Leo offered, and gestured to three assistants who approached him with a wide assortment of both melee and long-ranged weapons. He immediately grabbed the bow and quiver, and turned back to Leo. Maybe his fate would be a duel to the death against another inmate of the castle.

  
Leo gestured for his assistants to leave, and he and his jester-like companion joined Niles.

  
"Bows are not common here," he said with intrigue. "I'll enjoy watching this. You see the path that leads into a thicket ahead?" Niles nodded. "Through said path is an obstacle course. It contains targets both moving and still, along with some less desirable hazards. You will attempt this obstacle course, and take out every target you come across. Know this, outlaw. None of the targets are human, and you will not harm a single human with the bow you've been given. I and many others will be watching you carefully. I am a master over gravity with my use of the tome Brynhildr. If an arrow intentionally slips, my magic will prevent it from reaching anyone you intend to harm, and it will fall to the ground. Am I clear?"

  
"Yes," Niles replied, more from instinct than from actual agreement. He was beyond confused as to why the prince was giving him this task. He had been mentally preparing himself for the end, and now he had a bow and a challenge. But holding a bow made him feel focused, and he was ready to use it, regardless of why.

  
"Be as quick as possible, as you'll be timed," Leo said. "Your time begins when you reach the thicket. Good luck."

  
Niles dashed down the path and out of sight of the prince. Time meant nothing to him, and he was quick to locate each of the targets, all chunks of rock and wood painted black for camouflage. They darted about seemingly at random, charmed by a mage before his arrival. They broke into a fine powder when hit by his arrows, as though they were composed of chalk. The surrounding trees swung branches and limbs at him, and occasional birds swooped to peck at his head, but he evaded them all without a second thought. He was on a mission. Twenty targets were broken by Niles' arrows. Niles was given twenty-four arrows to use during the obstacle course, and four arrows remained when he emerged from the other side of the courtyard, where Leo and his companion awaited him.

  
"Done," Niles breathed. Leo's companion was nearly hopping around with excitement.

  
"What triumph!" he cried. "Many congratulations to you, O Rogue, for braving Lord Leo's gauntlet of nature!"

  
Niles couldn't help but smirk at the man's grandiose tone, but even Leo seemed mildly impressed.

  
"You broke Odin's record. Not bad at all. What's your name, rogue?"

  
"I'm Niles," he said. Niles unstrapped his quiver and made to hand it to the prince, or whoever would take it, but all eyes simply watched him hold out his weapon.  
"Niles..." Leo spoke, saying the name like he was weighing it in his hand. "I'd like to speak with you privately. Odin, I'll come find you in a few moments, but for now, I have something to discuss with our rogue."

  
Odin threw his cape tail to the wind as he turned to leave, and said, "Your will be done, milord! And fare thee well, rogue Niles!"

  
Niles watched the man go with mild sympathy, and when his gaze moved to Leo, the prince shared his expression.

  
"Odin is my retainer. He likes to live life very...enthusiastically. He's a skilled mage, however."

  
"Pardon the change of subject, but I'd like to ask what's happening," Niles said slowly, once again urging the prince to take his weapon. The prince simply offered him a light smile.

  
"You have drive, Niles," he said. "That, and talent. You also don't seem to carry yourself like a normal rogue; your speech, for instance, comes close to that of a royal. I've found myself quite fascinated by you."

  
Niles found himself at loss for how to respond, partially because many of his conversations with others weren't nearly this pleasant. He was still puzzled that he was still alive, still holding the bow Leo let him borrow.

  
"My apologies, I digress," Leo uttered, seeming to emerge from deep thought, "You wanted an explanation for why I'm doing all this. To put it bluntly, Odin is currently my only retainer, and as much as I appreciate what he does, his help is not quite enough. I'd like to ask if you'd become my retainer as well."

  
Niles nearly dropped his quiver.

  
"But, why?" was all he could muster without stuttering.

  
"What caught my eye first was that you begged me to kill you in the prison cell. I've had a few others to beg for death, but they were trying to get a stir out of me. You seemed genuine, and while I wanted to pity you, you didn't seem to desire pity. Also," Leo spread his hands, showing that they were empty, "I want you to notice that I did not bring Brynhildr with me. Odin would have been the one to rescue anyone that you intended to harm, not myself. I watched you carefully, however. You not once searched my person for my weapon when I threatened to use it. Had you any malicious intentions, you would have sized up Odin and myself better before you left for the obstacle course. That showed me your focus. The raw talent with a bow did nothing to harm your chances, mind, but at that moment, I knew who I wanted my retainer to be. I care not about your background, or your reason to cease living. I would love for you to live, however, and to help me and my family protect Nohr. All I ask is for your allegiance."

  
Niles watched Leo carefully as he spoke, as one might watch their messiah approach. While he would never consider Leo his messiah, his words made Niles feel...safe. To think, that a prince would see any good in a monster like him. Niles knelt before the prince, placing his bow and quiver on the ground. He wasn't sure what to do with his hands, so he instead rested them on his knee.

  
"I would be humbled...Lord Leo."


	3. Chapter 3

Niles quickly learned during his time adjusting to his new retainer life that he had mixed feelings about his duties. Of course he was grateful to have a safe place to rest at the end of each evening, and he was at least partially convinced that he was surrounded by allies instead of greedy scoundrels with their own agendas. He enjoyed the company of his new master, and quickly discovered that he would literally do anything to please Leo. While he recoiled from such a thought, he knew it was obvious. Even his new peers learned of his fierce loyalty.

Leo also seemed to be the best fit for him as liege, seeing as his siblings, in Niles' opinion, all seemed a touch mad. He had positively no qualms with serving prince Leo, and in fact enjoyed the work his new master laid out before him each day. He was allowed to keep the bow with which he completed the obstacle course, and was gifted an additional one that Leo stated 'was more suitable for a retainer.' The bow was a silver-tinted devil that Leo said was fashioned after the Mulagir of legend.

“No one in our army has so far been able to wield it correctly, but perhaps you can change that,” he told Niles upon his receiving the weapon.

The only major headache Niles experienced in his new life was being forced to mingle with his fellow retainers, especially when the four Nohr siblings met with King Garon. He found himself waiting for Lord Leo at the doors to the throne room at an increasing frequency as he settled into his new position, sometimes with no one else around for companionship but Odin.

“Foul consternation...!” Odin muttered to himself, violently writing and scribbling out lines on a loose page. In the meantime, he dramatically studied a tome at the corner of his crossed legs, as though he was reading it through its opaque cover.

“I request your assistance, my brooding comrade!” Odin announced to Niles from the other side of the door. Niles vaguely tilted his head in Odin's direction, which seemed enough for the mage. “Which of these two titles should I bestow upon this unmarked spell book?” His hands drew in an arc and his fingers wiggled in the air. “The Stygian Treatise? Or the Nebulous Abyss? I tend to lean more toward the latter name, but one cannot be too careful when anointing such a rare tome!”

“Just looks like a normal Nosferatu,” Niles responded with a shrug.

“Ah, and that would be where you're wrong! You see, one night I happened upon a seemingly abandoned shop, and my curious spirit drew me in! Finding that the door was neither barred nor locked, I discovered that it was open for business after all! The shop keep confided in me that the shop only opens for those of worthy constitution, so I browsed his wares and found--”

Niles pulled his hood over his forehead and feigned napping in an attempt to make the mage visually see how withdrawn from the conversation he was, but Odin prattled on nonetheless as though Niles were right in his face, nodding in agreement to each of his statements. He continued to wait for his master's return with the murmur of Odin's speech in the background of his mind until Leo and his three siblings finally appeared through the door. Xander, Camilla, and Elise each dispersed with their respective retainers until Leo was left. The prince stared at Niles and Odin, who had not moved from their places.

“You two seem to have made yourselves comfortable,” he muttered. “Was our meeting with King Garon that long?”

“Two hours, milord,” said Odin, folding his hands behind his head. “Never fear, though! We await your next commands!” Odin and Niles prepared for the lecture that always came when such a remark was made. Instead, however, Leo paid the remark no mind. In fact, he seemed lost in space. Odin cleared his throat. “Erm, I trust the counsel went well?”

“No, unfortunately,” Leo sighed. “I fear we may be on the brink of war.”

“With Hoshido?” asked Niles. Leo nodded.

“Prince Corrin has been kidnapped. My father will have few responses _but_ to wage war. This is the opportunity he has been wanting.”

Niles watched his master become visibly sick to the stomach. The gesture was gone in a moment, however, and Leo had once more regained his composure.

“Niles, Odin,” Leo said, “please enjoy the evening. I'll be retiring early. I'd like to not be disturbed.” Without time for a response from either retainer, Leo was on his way down the hall to his chamber as fast as he could without breaking into a jog.

Niles could not say a word, and for once, Odin was also speechless. The two glanced at each other before silently and awkwardly parting ways. It didn't make sense. Leo was a strategist. Sure, his older siblings were more physically suited for war, but of all of them, he would be the most prepared, the most confident in what to do. Why did such a threat make him so uneasy?

That evening, Niles made a pot of tea in the mess hall for Leo. He received many a strange stare from Jakob and Felicia as he prepared it, firstly because it was rare for a retainer to be in the royal kitchen, and secondly because Jakob had already been sent away from Leo's chamber after offering to make him tea. Niles didn't care, though. He and Jakob weren't the same person. 

He knocked gently at Leo's door, the tea tray balanced in his free hand. There was hesitation from the other side of the door, then the sound of someone standing.

“Who is it?” Leo called, a tinge of annoyance in his voice. Niles entered the chamber, silently brandishing the tea tray. Leo furrowed his brow and reseated himself at his desk, but kept his gaze on his retainer. “You realize that I sent Jakob away not an hour ago for offering to make me tea.”

“With all due respect, milord, if you're going to ruminate, you should at least do so while staying warm and hydrated.”

“You'd disobey an order from me?” Leo snapped, halfheartedly. Niles had to almost cover his mouth to stifle a laugh. He so enjoyed his master's attempts at threats.

“I disobey no orders so long as I am sufficiently performing my duties as your retainer. And those duties exclusively include your safety and well-being. Besides, Jakob simply offered to _make_ you tea. Mine is already made. Would be a shame to let it get cold.”

Niles set the tea tray on a clear space on Leo's desk. His master was eyeing the tea tray thoughtfully, but he said nothing. Niles turned and made to leave the chamber until he heard the soft grind of a porcelain cup against a porcelain saucer.

“Would you at least...” Leo's voice trailed off as he considered his words. “I'll...have some if you'll help me drink it. I've never had your tea before.”

Niles returned to the desk's side and waited for Leo to gesture him to sit before he pulled up a stool. “It's far from the best tea in Nohr, but I've paid close enough attention to others making it,” he said. “I make sure they _always_ prepare it the same way.” He made to pour his master a cup, but Leo was already lifting the tea pot to pour some for him. A smirk played at Leo's lips.

“You don't mean to imply that Jakob and Felicia would poison my tea?” he asked, facetiously. 

“Of course not! The thought has never crossed my mind.”

Leo uttered a low chuckle. It was rare to see Leo in any sort of jovial form, and sure enough, the smirk had slipped from his face in an instant. He studied his tea.

“I thought I was prepared for war,” he sighed. “I've read countless books. I can beat anyone in Nohr at chess. I take thorough notes during each counsel meeting. But now that war is at our doorstep, I feel naked.” Leo sipped the tea. “This is good – and Corrin...! I fear the sort of treatment he'll receive in Hoshido. He knows too little about the outside world to survive on his own.” He poured himself another cup. Niles had yet to touch his. “I should have visited more often. I've had years of opportunities. I could have taught him more, helped him prepare better for a scenario like this. I doubt Camilla or Elise taught him anything valuable during their visits. Oh, what am I even saying?” More tea was poured. “Hindsight will do nothing but further hinder our efforts. I should instead prepare for what's ahead. No doubt father will soon have us going after Corrin. I'll need to plan an efficient route. Maybe a--”

“Perhaps you should rest first, milord,” Niles interrupted. Leo paused, lifted the tea pot, and set it back down again. It was empty. What Niles thought may have been the shadow a blush flitted across Leo's face.

“I didn't intend to digress so,” he confessed. “Though I...thank you for listening. Leo was almost slumped in his seat. This was perhaps the first time Niles had witnessed his master with his guard down so much. What did it mean, however?

“I am humbled that you would trust me so much as to confide in me,” Niles said, and set his still-full cup onto the tray.

“It feels...nice to open up on occasion,” Leo admitted. “I think you're right. I should rest. Tomorrow's business can be done tomorrow.” Niles began to take the tray, but Leo put a hand over his to stop him. “Please, your position is not my butler. I'll have someone come take this. You should also rest. I'll have plans for you and Odin soon.”

Niles kept his hand on the tray for another few moments. Leo's grasp was firm but tender, perhaps even concerned. Finally, he bid his master good night and retired to his own chamber, all the while turning over the events of the evening in his mind. Leo was far too kind to him for his worth. There had to be some way for him to repay the kindness. His devotion was strong, and it seemed that Leo was aware of this strength, but there had to be more he could do.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A small warning: This chapter contains graphic depictions of violence.

One could always tell when Leo was leading a mission by the state of his camp. The tents stood in perfect rows, like fence pickets. The mess area was gridded to where it looked like there was an actual building in the middle of camp, only with invisible walls and roof. The campfires were meticulously placed as to not risk any sort of fire hazard from low-hanging limbs or loose fabric in the tents. What sometimes surprised Niles the most, however, was that Leo often made no orders for such thoroughness. Perhaps his soldiers simply knew how important the symmetry was to their lord, how severely a lack of such would throw off his feng shui, and more importantly, his mood.

Niles sat in the mess area with Odin, who was weaving a tale to the other peers at their table about monsters he called Risen. He wasn't listening, however. Instead, he observed a corner of the camp where soldiers were receiving medical attention from the battle they experienced earlier in the day, and his master was amongst the wounded. While Leo's injury was perhaps the least worrying – although having been cut by a shuriken that grazed his neck was quite embarrassing for the prince – he was being attended to the most diligently. 

He watched as a young cleric poured a tincture into a cloth and applied it to Leo's wound. The prince winced, and the cleric asked him something with a concerned expression. Leo responded, and while Niles was too far to hear anything said, something in his stomach prickled. He didn't know her, but whoever she was, she didn't deserve Leo's kindness. In fact, all but one or two clerics were left back at camp during the day's battle. They likely had never experienced the rush of seeing their own blood for the first time, unless the ranks protecting them somehow failed. If they did, they surely fainted from the overstimulation.

Niles spat into the grass as the cleric and Leo shared a laugh, a moment of jest that he couldn't, and wouldn't, hear. Leo's laughs were rare, and often polite if he ever shared them. This laugh was a polite one, but genuine nonetheless, and the thought drove claws into Niles' chest. He was familiar with jealousy, but didn't experience it often. Was it overprotection for his master? It had to be.

“My unscrupulous companion!” came Odin out of the blue. Niles ripped his attention from Leo with the intent of demanding some peace, until Odin thrusted a tray of teacups into his hands. 

“Please, won't you aid me in a small quest to quench the thirsts of our many camp inhabitants?” he asked. “Our maid was distributing the tea, but she grew faint, so I offer to lend a dark hand!” Niles would have normally responded with a remark made especially to make Odin feel uncomfortable, but a spark suddenly lit in his mind. He had a wonderful idea.

“It would be...my _pleasure_ ,” Niles simpered. “Allow me to take care of the infirmary.” 

“Superb! You have my gratitude, Niles!” With that, Odin began to serve his own tray of teacups to those lounging in the mess area. Niles swiftly carried his tray to the infirmary, and while he handed saucers to the many clerics and injured present, he kept an eye out for the cleric previously tending to Leo. She had left him while Niles was distracted, but was easy to spot in another corner, sitting alone. _Perfect._

With only three cups remaining on his tray, he approached the unassuming cleric, and offered her a saucer. She took it enthusiastically, and sipped from it. The corner of Niles' lip twitched.

“How's it taste?” he asked as he took a seat next to her.

“Oh, it's lovely!” she chirped. “I much prefer tea to coffee.”

“Why is that?”

“Well, it's much more palatable than coffee. Coffee has too much flavor sometimes! Plus, it makes me feel warmer inside.”

Niles couldn't help but chuckle. She was making things far too easy for him. He leaned over, cupped her ear, and whispered, “Well, if you're interested in coming by my tent later this evening, I can show you something else that'll feel warm inside you.”

The cleric froze with a gasp, then stood up and slapped him across the cheek before storming off. Niles moaned softly as her hit connected, partially for himself, but partially to also add to her discomfort. Good riddance, he thought. 

Once he was sure the cleric was gone for good, Niles stood and carried the two final saucers over to where Leo sat by a small fire, his eyes locked on the sky. His master silently took the cup Niles offered him, but only lowered his gaze to sip his tea.

“The stars are brighter than normal tonight, aren't they?” he said.

“I would have never guessed my lord was a stargazer,” Niles countered, taking the final saucer and joining his master's side.

“I'm normally not,” Leo muttered, finally looking Niles in the eye. “I've, of course, studied much in astronomy, astrology, and horoscopes. They're all quite generic subjects. But...I know you do a lot of stargazing, so I thought I might try it.”

Niles paused, his cup at his lip. His master had actually taken interest in something Niles did? He lifted his eyes to the night sky. The clearing Leo had chosen to set up camp gave them a stunning view of the constellations, unobstructed by trees, or even clouds. It brought the shadow of a smile to Niles' face.

“I'm honored that you would stoop to my level of hobby making in order to broaden your horizons,” he said. Leo waved a hand.

“Think nothing of it. Sometimes, I just find myself bowing my head into books and charts more often than ever. It's good to keep your chin up every once in a while so that you can survey your surroundings, or witness the beauty of the present moment.”

“What refreshing thoughts, milord.”

“I think we all need a bit of that in our lives right now.”

Niles looked to his master after a sip of tea to notice Leo's gaze lowered into the fire. The ever-moving shadows enveloped Leo's face like smoke. They lent his expression a maturity, a sobriety that Niles didn't feel he deserved. He was not the crown prince, like his elder brother, but he experienced the lead weight that was being royalty during the dawn of an attempted conquest just as much as Xander. Niles had to admit, however, that the expression also comforted him. He truly could trust Leo with his life. 

“Is this war still eating at you?” Niles asked, impulsively leaning closer.

“How could you tell...? Oh, come now, why do you make that face at me!?”

Niles was sneering. He suppressed it as best as he could.

“Sorry, milord. Sarcasm is surprisingly becoming of you.” Niles covered his mouth as the sneer returned upon seeing his master blush. It was all he could to do keep from snickering, and he knew Leo would have his head if he caught him laughing.

“I suppose something of yours has rubbed off on me,” Leo muttered. “I suppose I should also be retiring soon, before any of your other quirks begin to stick to me. Good night, Niles.” The prince stood, and left Niles stunned for a moment. He opened his mouth to apologize for anything he may have said to offend Leo, but caught a flicker of playfulness cross his master's face, and it eased him.

“Good night, milord,” he called, and stood to head for his own tent.

_____________________________________________________________

_The boy woke with a start, his head throbbing against the stone floor. A soft glow shone beneath the door of the dark room in which he lay, and he could hear voices. He shifted to sit up, but discovered that his wrists and ankles were tied. He knew that he was somewhere in his gang's hideout, but even as his eyes adjusted to the darkness, he couldn't recognize the room._

_With a bit of effort, he managed to prop himself upright against a wall, where the pounding in his head only increased in intensity. He glanced around the room again, this time looking for something to help free himself. Whoever tied him up, however, took care in making sure there were no stray knives lying around._

_The pain in the boy's head was becoming too much to bear, so he lay back down on the floor, and listened. The voices became louder, more violent. He could catch certain phrases, but was unable to piece together what they were discussing._

_“...trying to...can't believe...stupid little bastard...him a lesson or two...!”_

_The voices suddenly stopped, and in their place came the sound of approaching footsteps. The door burst open. A man came into the room, lumbered up to the boy, and kicked him in the stomach. The boy gasped, the wind knocked from his lungs. He glanced up at the man, whose eyes were wild with rage._

_“You damned brat! I should be kicking you harder than that for the trouble you caused us!”_

_“I'm sorry...!” the boy wheezed. The man crouched down and cupped the boy's chin in an unmerciful grip._

_“Boss says you're the best shot with an arrow he's ever seen...you couldn't hit the side of a barn! And now we're gonna have to move our hideout! Because you couldn't hit a measly merchant!”_

_“I-I'm sorry! I'll make it up to you! Name it, I'll do it!”_

_The man forced the boy upright by his chin before slamming his head against the stone wall. The pain in his head was now searing, almost causing him to black out._

_“You'll make up for it, that's for sure,” the man growled. He pressed a thumb to the boy's neck with his free hand, keeping the other hand firm on his chin. The thumb traced up the neck, chin, even cheek, until it came to the boy's right eye. The boy shut his eyes as the man's thumb pushed against the right eyeball, testing._

_“You would've killed him nice and easy if only you'd hit him right...here.” The man slowly increased his pressure on the eye, causing the boy more and more discomfort. It wasn't long until the discomfort became pain, however, shooting back into his skull and mingling with the throbbing headache he already experienced. The man only continued applying pressure as the boy cried out. Just when he thought his eye would be crushed, the man paused his pressure. It felt like a vice around his skull, but the man's grip on his chin was too strong – he was unable to escape!_

_“Why'd you miss?” the man asked._

_“I-I was scared! I didn't want to kill him, so I missed!”_

_“Well, you're scared now, aren't you?” The boy nodded, and the man feigned a look of concern. “One big difference, though. I'm not gonna let you go just because you're scared. Know why? Because I don't give a damn about how you feel. All I care about is the gold that'll go free on that merchant's carriage because of you being 'scared.' And since he won't be the one paying us, looks like you'll have to pay us instead.”_

_“But I don't have any money!”_

_“Oh, I know! That's why I'm gonna take this eye of yours. I'm sure it'll make us way more money than you did.”_

_The boy struggled against his binds desperately as the pressure resumed in his eye. The man's thumb was gradually pushing past his eyeball. He had no concern for the boy as he screamed, both from the white hot pain and from the fear of losing part of his sight. The thumb finally scooped, and as soon as the man had a good grip on the eyeball, he ripped it from the boy's skull. The boy heard the visceral tear of his optic muscles from inside of his head as his right eye left his body. His screams seemed like whispers. Was he crying, or was it a stream of blood?_

Niles woke and immediately sat up in bed. It did not surprise him that his skin shone with a fine layer of cold sweat. What did surprise him was that his breath was even. He was used to panting or crying out when he woke from this dream. He checked his pulse in his neck, and his heart rate was normal. His fingers lifted absently to his blind eye. The dream was already a distant silhouette. The dreams he dreamed from childhood always seemed to go from his memory as quickly as they came. Still, it was strange that his body reacted so calmly to the traumatic memory.

_Wonder if it means anything,_ he wondered. He got to his feet and made to get dressed. It would be hours before anyone else was awake, but he would not be getting any more sleep that night.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: This chapter contains depictions of self-harm.

By the time any other members of Leo's battalion were rousing from their tents, Niles had already returned from a river with three fish caught, and was helping build a fire on which to cook them. He worked slowly at scaling the fish, when Leo approached him. While his master retained his usual composure, he could tell that Leo had just woken up, and was probably waiting on coffee from one of the butlers.

“Morning,” said Leo, groggily. “You always seem like you've been awake for hours longer than anyone else. Do you often wake up in the middle of the night?”

“Happens more often than not,” Niles said with a shrug.

“But why is that? Is something wrong?”

“Nothing much, milord. I simply don't sleep well.”

“Insomnia? Because I know the perfect charm that would cure you of that.”

“It's...a little more complicated than that.”

Leo paused, and Niles could tell he was searching for an apology. He opened his mouth to reassure the prince, when Odin joined them, stretching and grunting loudly.

“And Odin Dark rises with the sun in a reluctant truce!” he exclaimed. “Good morrow, friends.”

“Ah, good timing, Odin,” Leo sighed, “I have an important task for you.” As Odin froze, his attention snared, Leo pulled a map from a pouch at his side, and unfurled it. He kneeled so that both retainers could see the route marked on the map from their current location to the Ice Tribe. “We'll be wrapping up this mission soon. I need you to leave tomorrow for the Ice Tribe, where my brother Corrin is currently suppressing a rebellion. I'm sure he could use your assistance.”

Odin inspected the route thoroughly, but when he looked back up to his master, a look of slight dissatisfaction pulled at his face. Leo cleared his throat in annoyance.

“Um...for he is...the one who wields the chosen Yato! Such great darkness emits from this weapon that...er...your combined powers will...will surely lead to the destruction of our enemies!”

Odin beamed from ear to ear, and, flourishing an open palm to the wind, struck a pose.

“At last! A grand opportunity to allow Odin Dark to display his grand prowess! I'll make preparations immediately!” Odin trotted off toward his tent and left Niles with Leo, who was scrubbing his face with the palm of one hand, and tucking the map away with the other. He stifled a yawn.

“I fear it's far too early in the morning for me to correctly function yet,” he mumbled. “I've forgotten what we were previously discussing. Regardless, I'd like you to stay by my side while Odin goes ahead of us. I'm sure you'll find some way to fill the void of his absence, difficult as that may be.”

Niles chuckled as he resumed scaling his fish. His master's sense of sarcasm had been blossoming as of late. Even Leo smirked to himself at the thought of his own tone. A butler quickly broke his secret moment as he brought the prince his coffee. Leo froze all other actions to take the cup and inhale its aroma.

After a quick sip, he continued, “We will of course join my brother soon after Odin. It's simply more important right now to return to Castle Krakenburg and report to father of my own mission. It's better to let him think he has more control over my actions before I go sneaking about.”

Niles wiped his hands clean on a cloth after laying out his fish to be prepped for cooking. From his peripheral, he caught a glimpse of Leo offering his hand. Niles looked up at the prince. In the luster of the rising sun, Leo's gentle expression glowed in unison with the growing light. Niles could feel his heartbeat.

“I'd like to keep at least one trusted companion at my side during these next few days,” Leo said. “Would you be up to the task?”

Niles found himself taking Leo's hand and bringing it swiftly to his lips, pressing them against the back of his palm.

“There are very few things I would love more, milord.”

Leo's hand slid from Niles' grip in no more time than it took Niles to take it. He couldn't tell if the action was done in disgust, or in fear of others seeing. Nonetheless, Leo turned from his retainer and cradled his coffee in both hands.

“V-Very well,” he stuttered. “Come...see me once you've completed your cooking task. I'd like to make sure you and Odin know the way.”

As Niles watched his master leave, a feeble ache emerged in his chest. It was soon gone, however, and Niles began to prep his fish. He worked slowly, perversely, making sure to experience each slice of his knife with as many senses as he could.

__________________________________________________________________________

Niles drew the dagger blade away from his palm. Despite being snug in its sheath strapped to his thigh, the Nohrian chill still made the blade cold, and its invasion of his warm flesh sent a small shock up Niles' wrist. He suppressed a shudder and leaned against the inside of the tent wall to watch his hand drip into a dirty cloth he had prepared at his feet.

The sight of the blood quickly absorbing into the cloth reminded him of the many past wounds he had endured through hands other than his own, the sound of the muffled drip similar to a ticking pocket watch. He no longer felt a sting when he sliced himself open, which, if he was in the right state of mind, sometimes concerned him. Perhaps one day he would cut an artery. He would casually gather himself and roam the halls of Castle Krakenburg toward the infirmary until he collapsed. Perhaps Elise would not come in time to heal him.

But then I couldn't serve my lord, he thought. What a coward he would accuse me to be, going like that.

Niles sheathed his dagger and picked the cloth up to press it hard against his hand as he heard footsteps in the grass and rustling against his tent flap. It was late. What could anyone possibly want of him at this time of night? A hand scratched at the fabric of the tent flap, a makeshift knock. Niles knew exactly who that could be.

“Come in, milord,” he called, standing and deftly wrapping his hand with the cloth. Leo entered the tent and paused, not immediately looking at his retainer, but deep in thought. Finally, he met Niles' gaze.

“I pray this isn't a bad time,” he began, “but I'm aware that you are usually up and about around this hour. I know this is a bit last-minute, but I was wondering if you would accompany Odin tomorrow. I'm beginning to fear he may not--” Leo froze, and quietly sniffed the air. “Where is that smell coming from?”

“What smell, milord?”

“I'm quite familiar with the smell of blood, Niles.” Leo struck Niles with a stern sideways glance. “You've not done harm to anyone?”

“No, sir,” Niles replied quickly, hesitantly showing him the reddening cloth on his hand. “A wound, is all.”

Leo didn't move for a few long moments. Then his hands moved behind his back, and he waited. Both men stood their ground silently. “We've not been to battle today,” Leo finally said.

“The wound is from a skirmish a few days back, when we first embarked on our mission. It reopened this evening. Once the clerics are awake tomorrow, I'll be sure to--”

“Do you take me for a fool, Niles?” Leo spat. Niles winced, and not from the gash in his palm.

“No, milord.”

“Then tell me the truth.”

Niles heaved a great sigh. Never leaving his master's eyes, he reached for the dagger, slid it from its sheath once again and, wrapping his wounded hand around the blade, repressed the urge to create a new gash. Leo's eyes never faltered, except to carefully watch him hold the blade.

“Do you wish to abandon me?” Leo asked.

“No, milord.”

“Then why would you perform such absurd feats?” Leo enunciated the word 'absurd' with such venom that Niles felt the word physically hit him. Of course his master wouldn't understand – having grown up in royalty and luxury spared him the need to understand why anyone would cause themselves injury.

“It distracts me,” Niles uttered. Then he caught a glimpse of the impatience in his master's eyes. He knew the brevity of his answer would never suffice, so he continued, reluctantly, “As you know, on many nights, when I have time to think or dream, I recall fractions of my past. None of these fractions help me sleep, and they in fact cause me to ruminate even more. Sometimes I lose track of my mind, and in order to redirect my focus to the present,” he lifted his injured fist, still clutching the blade, “I cut myself open.”

Leo said nothing for a long while. Niles was prepared for an earful at any given moment, but the longer he watched his master ponder his words, the less he believed he would be scolded for his actions.

“Say you...” Leo's voice trailed off, and as Niles sheathed his dagger, he caught sight of something on his master's face. Was that sadness? Leo cleared his throat, and repeated, “Say you...were to misjudge your cut. What then?”

“Then I might not be here now, milord.” Niles shrugged, and instantly regretted it as Leo's face turned sour.

“How impertinent, as if you find your own life meaningless. What would I do if I were missing a retainer?”

“You would find a replacement.”

“I would, but through necessity, not through desire. You're one of the finest archers in Nohr! You're one of my most trusted men! Do you not value being under my protection?”

“My life is a dispensable pawn to Nohr's better future, and to your whims.”

“That isn't true. As your lord, I intend to protect you as much as you protect me.”

“But, why?” Niles blurted. Leo frowned at him in concern, a look Niles wasn't used to seeing. He wished he hadn't spoken, but his words were true.

“I...think myself to be a bit more dignified than the trite images people assume Nohrian royals represent,” Leo said carefully. Niles hated to see it, but his master seemed hurt. “I have no desire to simply use my retainers as human shields in the battlefield. I look to you and Odin for drive. You both keep me in check, you inspire me to better myself, daily. Part of why I spend time with you both is because I enjoy the company, not just because of your connection to me. The fact that you respect me at all puts me at ease. And I have a question for you as well. Why do you find your life such a waste of time?”

“I am but shattered pottery, milord,” Niles said. Much to his surprise, Leo smiled in response.

“And what of it?” This made Niles' brows knit together in confusion.

“A broken basin cannot hold anything, milord. Even if one were to diligently piece the vase back together, it would still leak. It no longer has a purpose.” Niles unwrapped the cloth from his hand to show his master his wound. It still bled slightly. “Therefore, aside from giving my life to serve you, I also no longer have a purpose.”

“You're partially correct. A shattered basin may not be useful for its intended purpose, but it can be used for other things. Do you know how it can be useful?” Niles shook his head, and Leo's smile broadened. “Art. Some of the murals decorating the halls of Castle Krakenburg are made from paint, but others were tediously created using chips and pieces of glass and pottery. And personally, I enjoy looking at murals more than I enjoy looking at vases. I like to think of you as a mural rather than just shattered pottery. You may have your past, and its negative influence on your thoughts. But you have a future now, one that I will help protect so that you may pave it for yourself.”

Niles couldn't help but smirk at such a sentiment. Leo never ceased to surprise him in his ways of compassion and understanding.

“Thank you, milord,” he said quietly. He examined his palm, and though it was tender, the wound had stopped bleeding. “I suppose I needed a good beating of tough love.”

A playful tug of the lips stole across Leo's face before he straightened it once more.

“I'll see to it that a salve for your hand is prepared first thing in the morning. Now, what was it I wanted to talk to you about originally? Oh, yes. I need you to accompany Odin in assisting Corrin. He'll be quite annoyed, I'm sure, but he's already aware of your company. My brother could use your skills.”

“Will you be safe long enough to return to the Castle?” Niles asked.

“I'm only losing two of my men for a few days. I'll be en route to join you two as soon as my duties are all complete. So, would you be willing?”

“Only if my master can promise a safe reunion with me in one piece,” Niles cooed. Leo's face lit up in the lamp light of the tent. Niles bit the inside of his lip. “Ah, my apologies. Was it about earlier today...?”

“No...it's not that...” Leo's voice trailed off.

“I do apologize for my behavior. It was uncalled for.”

“You...speak too soon, Niles,” Leo said, offering him an expression that he could not quite read. “The gesture wasn't...unwelcome. It simply caught me off guard. You never cease to intrigue me.”

With his words still hanging in the air, Leo exited Niles' tent and left Niles with that unfamiliar warmth spreading in his chest. He made to prepare his belongings for his journey with Odin, but his thoughts were not at all on his new mission.


	6. Chapter 6

Leo was awake early enough the next morning to see Odin and Niles off on their journey to join Corrin. The prince still retained a regality as he sat upon his horse, his whole battalion packed and ready to diverge paths with the two retainers, but Leo occasionally scratched at bags beneath his eyes with the back of his palm.

_Was he up bothering over something last night?_ Niles wondered. He watched his master and Odin discuss paths out of earshot while he kept their supplies company. Leo had entrusted Odin with the map to the Ice Tribe, and they were almost ready to leave, but Niles fought a downward tug of the lip as Leo gestured that he was finished speaking with Odin. He worried that Leo would suffer from this sleep deprivation on his way to meet King Garon, if he wasn't careful.

Odin finally turned to join Niles, and Leo scrubbed at his eyes once again. When his hands drew away from his face, his gaze locked with Niles. Niles quickly realized how intently he had been staring at his master when Leo averted his gaze with a blush. The sight threatened a blush upon Niles' own cheeks, and he froze where he stood. Why was he sharing the same sheepishness that he was growing more and more used to seeing on Leo's behalf? And why was the confounded warmth spreading in his chest again? Was it because he was parting ways with the master to whom he found himself so loyal? Was it because he kissed Leo's hand?

Odin's hand on his shoulder brought Niles back to reality enough to help mage gather their belongings and begin traipsing into the wilderness with him, but his mind revolved around a single question all the while: What did his behavior around Leo mean?

________________________________________________________

After assisting Corrin in his mission to suppress the rebellion in the Ice Tribe, Odin and Niles were introduced to Corrin's hub in the Astral Plane. As the two retainers began to settle, Odin remembered a letter he was to deliver to Corrin from Leo. The letter contained specific details for the two retainers in Leo's absence. Corrin winced in sympathy as he narrated from the letter that Niles was to be assigned guard duty at the prison until Leo returned, as “punishment for speaking filthily to yet another cleric in the battalion.” Niles had to hide a smirk when Corrin broke this assignment to him. He actually loved working in the prisons, and Leo knew it. 

_Almost as though he knew I needed downtime to think._ Niles chuckled to himself and leaned against the prison wall. He had adapted nicely to his new assignment, almost finding it relaxing. He ignoring one of the newer prisoners as they spat through the bars. His thoughts centered around far more important issues. Over the past few days, Niles had gradually noticed that his attitude toward his master had shifted. He still felt utter respect and loyalty toward Leo, but something new was there now. He still could not pinpoint the source of the unfamiliar warmth in his chest, and he occasionally felt what he believed was pining for Leo's return in the days following the retainers' settlement in Corrin's army.

Niles had felt similar sensations before, these waves of warmth in the chest, but they were often of less pure intentions. He knew what lust felt like, knew that this warmth was a similar sensation, but also knew that he didn't necessarily feel lust toward Leo; the warmth felt more simplified. Yes, perhaps he wanted to see Leo's face contorted in pain and pleasure, but he also wanted to press their foreheads together so he could drink deep from Leo's blush without his constant aversion of the eyes. He wanted to hold Leo's hand, help him calm his nerves when he grew uneasy before combat.

“So if it's not lust, then what is it?” he asked himself. He folded his arms and flipped his thoughts around inside his head until he heard footsteps approach. He looked up to find Corrin coming into the prison, and smiled thinly.

“Lord Corrin,” he said. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“Evening, Niles,” Corrin replied, “I was wondering if you'd like to switch positions for a while so you can go to the mess hall for some food. Effie cooked this evening, so I don't think there will be leftovers later.”

“How considerate. You're too kind, really.”

Corrin waved a hand dismissively at the comment. “No, no need for flattery. I want to make sure you and Odin are well looked after. I just wish I could compare to how well my siblings treat their retainers. I need more practice.”

Niles chuckled in amusement, pressing off from against the wall. “You'd be hard pressed to find anyone more lavish in care than my master.”

“That's a funny thought, considering how rigid Leo can be at times. If you don't mind me asking, how has he been caring toward you that would make you say so?”

Niles paused, unsure if he should humor the prince. A quick glance into Corrin's curious gaze assured him that he seemed genuine - if not naive - in his question, so he decided to play along.

“Let's just say,” Niles began, “that my lord's care is the reason I am still alive today. Without him, I would likely be dead - at least, metaphorically.”

“That sounds pretty noble.”

“Is does, doesn't it? He continues to surprise me with his generosity.”

Niles was taken slightly aback as Corrin regarded him with him a gentle, sympathetic smile.

“Did I say something overly sentimental?” he asked. Corrin shook his head, his smile unfaltering.

“Ah, no, sorry. I just find it intriguing how your expression changed when you spoke of my brother. Your pupils dilated and your tone softened. You must really love him.”

Niles opened his mouth, but no words came out. In fact, for a brief moment, Corrin and the prisoners in the background all faded from the room, and the prison walls around him all fell into a void, as all the jumbled pieces in Niles' head snapped together. The warmth, the mysterious sensation he had been feeling - it was love. It had to be. But what did that even mean? Niles had never felt love for someone before. How was he supposed to express this feeling to Leo? How would Leo react?

The mist in Niles' head dispersed, and the prison returned around him. Corrin appeared before him once more, still smiling. Niles felt his mouth growing dry, and closed it. He felt...strange.

“I suppose that finishes our little chat,” Niles said, his composure returning by the second and his desire to be alone desperate. “We should talk more, you and I. I'm sure our conversations would be captivating. But, for now, I'll take you up on your offer. I'll be sure to return once I've eaten.”

He left the prison before Corrin had time to reply, and headed for the mess hall. While his appetite was not exactly lost, he had little need to eat. The revelation he experienced in the prison was far more important, and while he had no idea how to respond to his newfound feelings, he knew that, when Leo returned to join Corrin's ranks, he would better understand what to do.  
__________________________________________________________________

When Corrin's army reached the city of Cyrkensia, the place was bustling, even more so than usual. Niles and Odin fell in behind Corrin, Camilla, and Elise, along with the siblings' retainers. Excited murmurs amongst the army rose and fell about the possibility of seeing a show in one of Cyrkensia's opera houses, but Niles could not have cared less. He and Odin, who only slightly feigned his apathy, kept a look out for suspicious activity while the royal siblings discussed their next course of action. 

Suddenly, a glimpse of blond caught Niles' eye. There were many heads of blond hair in the sea of people bustling around the opera house, but one stuck out in particular. He would recognize that hair anywhere.

“Lord Leo,” he whispered, and yet his master seemed to hear him as he approached Corrin's ranks, gaze trained on him while still facing his three siblings. Leo spoke with the three, and his attention flickered often to them as they discussed the evening's events, but often did Niles catch Leo's attention returning to him. His every word hung in the air as Niles listened. A show to celebrate the king's visit? Splendid. A chance to help his master protect his father? Consider it done. It hadn't been a long time since he and his master parted ways, but it still seemed too long a time.

As the siblings dispersed - along with the rest of the army - to begin preparations for the show, Odin and Niles joined their master. Leo regarded them both with more warmth than Niles was used to Leo ever displaying in public. The warmth quickly faded, however, and was replaced by feigned aloofness. That was more like it.

“I take it neither of you have driven my brother mad yet,” he scoffed. “I plan to separate you from the group for tonight, however. I'd like to ask your help in protecting my father during the performance.”

Odin struck the air triumphantly with a fist, and said, “To stand side by side with our lord once more? What splendor!”

“It has been a while,” Niles admitted, his gaze resting on his master's for a moment while Odin posed at the ready in the background. “Might be nice to share old experiences again.”


	7. Chapter 7

Niles was never fond of having his wounds dressed. Sure, he wouldn't just leave his injuries untouched, but in the past his bandages were simple, and he used no salves. It took him a while to grow even tolerant of the Nohrian clerics and their extensive use of staves and medicine, and even then he still created a fuss when he was directed to an infirmary.

An older cleric sat by him, pulling a bandage taut against his forehead where a gash still bled. He hummed softly with the sting of antibacterial ointment smearing against the wound, but he simply wasn't in the mood, either for relishing the dull throb in his skull or for providing the poor old woman with unwanted slurs. 

The spirits of the rest of the Leo's chamber were not much higher. Odin flexed an injured palm as a maid finished wrapping it. He was one of the lucky ones, escaping the day with merely a scratch. Nearly every soldier in Leo's unit was injured in the surprise attack from Hoshido during the opera performance. Being separated from Corrin's group and being the only ones able to protect King Garon from the ambush left them slightly more vulnerable than Leo would have liked, in hindsight. Thankfully none were critically hurt, but as Niles glanced over at his master, being tended to by a worried Elise, he could tell that Leo was in the worst of moods.

Elise drew her stave away from her brother, an ethereal light dissipating from its trident tip, and shook her head. “That's the best I can do for now,” she said with a frown. “I don't want to overwhelm your body. I'll take another look at it once we're out of Cyrkensia, but for now, just rest. And no magic!” Leo shot her an expression of outrage, and in response she wagged an index finger at him. “No. Magic. You'll make the wound take longer to heal! You know you can't properly use magic when your arm is busted up like that.”

Leo gritted his teeth, but said nothing. Niles was just as surprised as Elise to see Leo concede in such silence. Leo was truly in the _worst of moods_. The prince raised a hand to the gauze covering his bicep and tried to stifle a wince of pain. An arrow had pierced straight into the muscle during their conflict, and even with the best magic Elise could conjure, Leo's arm would be useless for a few days, at least. Niles shook his head softly. _I should have seen the archer more quickly. I could have prevented this._

Odin stood from his stool and thanked his maid for her help. He yawned, examining his hand. “The enemy has sapped me of my strength. I must rest...augh, my sword h--” he cleared his throat, “--my spell hand...” 

Not a word was spoken as Odin left for his own chamber, followed closely by Elise. The remaining clerics checked once more on their prince before also leaving, leaving Niles the only one remaining in Leo's chamber. The prince crossed the room, still cradling his arm, and finally regarded Niles.

“You've always been more persistent in my care than even the clerics,” Leo chuckled half-heartedly, taking a seat at his desk. “You're free to get some rest whenever you'd like. We should be safe for now.”

Niles' brow furrowed – Leo wasn't often one fore idle chitchat. He had remained behind for a reason, but wasn't sure if his master would be up for his company. Still, with Leo joining Corrin's army soon, he couldn't see a another chance to be alone with his prince arise for some time after tonight. He had to act.

“Before I leave,” he started, “I wonder if you'd allow me your presence for just a moment longer.” He sidled toward his master's desk and casually spread a hand over a small stack of books on its surface.

“I'll of course allow it, but what more is there to do?” Leo asked. His tone betrayed him. His voice was that of a testy tactician eager to retire for the night, but Niles saw a softness in Leo's eyes that might have almost appreciated him as a distraction.

Niles shifted his weight into his hand, which kept the books weighed in place as Leo absent-mindedly tried to slip the top volume from the stack.

“Firstly, I want to make sure that you don't try and pour into any more studies this evening. The bout we experienced tonight drained you. It drained me, too. Therefore, your rest is of upmost importance to me. Secondly...” Niles' swapped his hand for both of his elbows so that he could bend over the desk and look his master in the eye from a more level stance. He swallowed. “I need your help.”

“What can I help you with?” Leo asked slowly.

“I desire to test...a theory, one of which I actually fear the results.”

Leo said nothing, but searched Niles' eyes with his own. It felt as though he were seeking out the theory himself, and though Niles knew his master would not be able to read his mind, the very thought made him nearly shiver. He focused on the gentle knock of his pulse in his head wound as Leo finally straightened in his seat.

“Forgive me,” he muttered. “For a moment, I thought your statement was in jest, as I know you and Odin both enjoy your little plays on words. I came to realize that you were not being cynical, however. Please, tell me any way that I can help you test--”

Leo was unable to finish his sentence as Niles swiftly leaned in and pressed his lips against his master's. Leo froze, but neither pulled away nor pushed closer. Niles held the kiss long enough for him to breathe deeply, inhaling the scent of Leo's skin, felt the warm practically radiate from Leo's face, and parted their lips.

Leo shot his retainer an expression of exasperation, one that caused Niles to recoil slightly. He prepared for the worst.

“Why did you interrupt me like that?”

Niles made to smile, but instead broke into laughter – a deep, hearty laughter that clenched his stomach with every heave of his diaphragm. He had not laughed so genuinely in a long time.

“My, aren't you in a strange mood today,” Leo grumbled. “First, you speak to me about theories and fears, then you kiss me, and now you laugh at me. Has your separation from me made you this irrational?” As Niles' laughter slowly faded and he simply regarded his master with a silly grin, Leo prickled. “Your _theory_. You never explained it to me.”

“Milord, that _was_ my theory.”

“What was?”

“It was a theory on your reaction if I kissed you.”

Leo paused to touch his lips with his fingers, as if the kiss were still imprinted there.

“Was...your theory correct?”

“Your reaction was far from my expectations, actually. In fact, only now have you even acknowledged that I did anything. That's why I laughed. My apologies, milord, but your reaction was unexpected.”

“But I know you, Niles,” Leo smiled a shrewd smile. “I may always have my head buried in my studies, but that doesn't mean that I don't pay attention to my retainers, or their concerns.”

“So you discovered my intentions before even I did.”

“To be honest, I don't think I did.”

“Then why did you react as though you knew I would kiss you someday?”

To this Leo turned back to his desk, his thumb and index fingers cupping his chin. “I'm not quite sure of that myself,” he said carefully. “It seems you aren't even sure of these intentions yourself.”

“No, milord, I'm not,” Niles shook his head and grinned with bemusement. Sometimes his master was too intelligent for his own good. “However...if you would be willing to assist me in uncovering what these intentions are, I would be just fine with being unsure.”

Leo did not respond, nor did he have to, as his sheepish leaning forward told Niles all he needed to know. He kissed his master once more, and this time the kiss felt like a warm embrace shared between the two of them from across the desk.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A small warning: This chapter contains sexual content.

As the war on Hoshido raged, morale in Corrin's troops began to drop. While the Nohr siblings were all finally reunited, having Xander's division added to the army did little to raise spirits. Corrin's betrayal by Kotaro in Mokushu and the conflicted truce with Saizo to find Kagero left many soldiers feeling drained. Corrin became increasingly worried for both his army's mental health and his own until Camilla had the brilliant idea of having a hot spring installed in the Astral Plane.  
  
The process took little time at all, especially considering how time differed between the Astral Plane and Mokushu. Once the members of Corrin's army were able to access the springs, chins quickly lifted, smiles quickly returned to faces, and positive vibes flowed during the army's downtime once again.  
  
Even Niles found himself returning to the hot springs as often as he could spare. The army had not been to battle in a couple of days, so he had bided his time while the majority of the army took advantage of the free time to soak in the waters. Finally, once the crowds in the springs had died down, Niles made his visit. He changed from his clothing and washed the grime from his skin in a shower before quietly making for the waters. As he passed Kaze, who greeted him politely on his way out of the springs, he hoped that luck would allow him a few moments in the springs alone. He positively despised the idle conversation some of the other troops would make with him as he attempted to soak in peace.  
  
He was disappointed upon entering the spring to find that he would not be soaking alone that evening as he saw the silhouette of another visitor shifting in the waters. Thankfully, however, the figure was lounging against the far corner of the bath, so Niles situated himself at the opposite corner, dropping into the water with abandon and enjoying the small shock of pain the steaming water sent through his legs. As he leaned against the wall and dipped his arms into the water, he feigned staring into the distance as he attempted to see who was lounging across from him in the waters. If only the steam wasn't so thick, he could probably pick the figure out.  
  
Giving up, he closed his eye and rolled his neck between his shoulders, hearing the waters shift from the opposite end of the pool. The soft slap of wet feet against the tile flooring approached his right side. The figure was leaving the hot springs – excellent. He counted the figure's footsteps and timed them with his breath as he inhaled for four strides, then exhaled for four strides, and repeated. The sound was almost at the exit when the footsteps stopped abruptly. Niles held his breath, waiting for the strides to resume.  
  
“Niles, is that you?”  
  
Niles' eye snapped open and he turned in the waters to see Leo crane his neck in his retainer's direction. His arms were crossed against his chest, but the body language did not appear imply a distantness; it implied a sheepishness.  
  
“Good evening, Lord Leo,” he said. “I couldn't tell who you were from the opposite corner, but wanted to leave you in peace, at any rate.”  
  
“I'm glad for it,” Leo sighed, approaching the corner's edge. “It bores me when others wish to make hollow chitchat while I'm trying to relax. However, I must admit, now that I know that it is you here, would you mind if I joined you?”  
  
“Not at all, milord.”  
  
Leo slinked into the water and took a seat next to his retainer, gradually uncrossing his arms. Niles noticed he still kept them in his lap, however.  
  
“This place was greatly needed, don't you agree?” Leo asked. Niles nodded silently. “I was close to dozing off, honestly, but at some point today I need to meet with my siblings and discuss our next plans. I'd love to make going here a regular occurrence, however. It just melts away my tension, if only for a moment!”  
  
Niles kept himself visually engaged with Leo's speech just enough to satisfy the prince, but his attention was focused on his master's neck, on how his tendons rose from and sank into his skin as he shifted his head, on how his Adam's Apple slid up and down as he spoke. Very seldom did Leo remove his armor, and even when he did he still wore tall collars that obscured his neck and shoulders. Plus, it did little to stare at his master when he wore more casual clothing. This was the first time Niles was able to truly watch how Leo's muscles worked.  
  
Droplets of water still clung to his master's arms, biceps more toned and lithe than Leo would have anyone believe. Even with the arrow wound he had suffered from over a week ago, the muscle remained healthy underneath. Niles watched Leo touch his chest with a spread palm in a gesture that he honestly didn't hear. He was too busy watching the chest swell with each inhale his master took, each inhale controlled by his diaphragm, the diaphragm housed inside his abdomen, which lingered beneath the water in ripples that would inevitably lead deeper into Leo's body.  
  
“Niles? Niles...!”  
  
Niles mentally shook himself from his daydream, and regarded Leo with a mere blink.  
  
“Yes, milord?”  
  
“Your staring has me feeling self-conscious...”  
  
“You've no need to feel self-conscious, though. I'm simply admiring your form beneath all your armor.”  
  
Leo instinctively wrapped his arms across his shoulders, sinking a bit deeper into the water.  
  
“Ugh, why do you think I wear so much of it? I'm not nearly as muscular or strong in physique as Xander, or Odin, or even yourself.”  
  
Niles' brow knit slightly, and though he loathed the thought of sympathetic touch, he placed a hand on Leo's shoulder. Below his hand, Leo's wound continued to heal, albeit slowly. Leo had resumed practicing his magic long before Elise was comfortable with him doing so, but thankfully the muscle tissue was repairing itself well under the princess' medicine. Even still, the raw flesh would take another month to scar over.  
  
“Perhaps I should adopt shoulder guards more similar to the kind Xander wears,” Leo muttered, noticing Niles examine his wound.  
  
“I'll be more careful next time,” Niles whispered, gently tracing the edges of the wound with his fingertips. He watched his prince follow his fingers with his eyes.  
  
“It couldn't have been helped,” Leo finally said. “Whoever shot that arrow was either foolhardy or incredibly skilled. It had nothing to do with your level of attention.”  
  
“Alas, I allowed an arrow to damage your perfect figure.”  
  
Leo leaned slightly away from his retainer's touch, his expression sheepish, as he said, “My body is nothing special...”  
  
“Leo, your -- I mean, Lord Leo, your body is --”  
  
“No other nobles surround us to require your honorifics, Niles.”  
  
Niles paused, momentarily rendered speechless by the suggestion. Leo turned his head, his cheeks burning in the heat.  
  
“Regardless,” Leo blurted, “I know you were going to compliment me, and I appreciate it. I only show myself without armor to a select few.”  
  
“I feel honored to be one of those people,” said Niles. He tested his hand on his master's shoulder once more, and, seeing Leo remain still instead of leaning away again, he slid the hand to his neck, then his cheek.  
  
“Maybe I can help you understand how lovely your body is,” he cooed, gently coercing Leo's chin back around to face him.  
  
“How would you do that?”  
  
“Do you trust me?” Leo nodded without a second thought. It almost made Niles wince. “You shouldn't.”  
  
“Why in the gods' names wouldn't I?”  
  
“I'm a disgusting person, on the inside and out.”  
  
“Oh, come now. Yes, perhaps your past may influence you now, but--”  
  
Niles silenced his master with a rough kiss. At first, Leo murmured irritably against Niles' lips, but he gradually relaxed, allowing their lips to mold together warmly. Niles pushed his luck by slowly moving closer, straddling his master's lap, his lips never once leaving Leo's. This way, Niles was able to press him firmly against the wall of the bath.  
  
He chuckled into the kiss, which made Leo part their lips sharply.  
  
“W-What's so funny?” he demanded.  
  
“I can _feel_ you, milord,” Niles smiled impishly as he watched Leo's entire face blossom a bright red. Leo cupped his own cheeks in a desperate attempt to hide his blush.  
  
“Hardly helps that you're comfortably sitting on it,” he growled.  
  
“Again, Leo, do you trust me?”  
  
“Yes, I trust you. Why?”  
  
Niles gave no answer, but instead slid from his master's lap, a hand lingering on Leo's chest for a few moments as Leo eyed him suspiciously. Then he dunked his head beneath the steaming water. The heat burned his face and his eye, igniting an excitement within him as he found Leo's trunks with his hands, sliding them away from his pelvis.  
  
Leo was still hardening beneath his clothing, and Niles tenderly wrapped a hand around him in encouragement, smiling as he flinched at the touch. He found Leo's tip, wrapping his lips around it and working his way down. Hot water filled his mouth, and slowly he developed a pumping rhythm around his master. Leo's pelvis squirmed beneath him, and his hands grasped Niles' head and shoulders in an attempt to pull him from beneath the water. Niles noted, however, the half-heartedness of the prince's tugs, as though he were more concerned for Niles' ability to breathe than the riskiness of going down on him in a public hot spring.  
  
The moving water drowned out almost all other sounds around him, but even still, Niles sensed sounds emitting from vibrations in Leo's torso. He could tell from the way Leo's hands had gone limp around his retainer's shoulder and head that the sounds Leo was emitting above the surface of the water were _not_ pure ones.  
  
Niles slowed his pace considerably, focusing instead on making sure his master felt every sensation spark through his shaft, and Leo's hands found their firm grip once more. For a moment, Niles took the grip as a shock of pleasure, but again Leo tugged at Niles' head and shoulders, and this time the move seemed desperate. He paused, then removed Leo from his mouth and lifted his head above the water in one swift motion. As he sucked in oxygen, Leo fussed with his trousers in a panic. It took a moment for the water to clear from Niles' ears enough to hear the soft smack of a new set of feet on the tiles.  
  
“Good evening, Leo, Niles,” came the voice of Xander as he dipped his toes into the water nearby the other two. Leo busied himself splashing water onto his face, possibly to rid himself of his flush, as Xander waded through the water to join them. He gave Niles a polite and bemused smile as the retainer ran his hands through his hair, wringing it out.  
  
“It is not recommended that one be swimming about in this hot water,” he advised. “The temperature is bad for your scalp, so take caution.”  
  
“Duly noted, Lord Xander,” said Niles drolly.  
  
He stood, and regarded his master, who seemed finished scrubbing his face. The red on Leo's cheeks had not completely vanished, but at least now it looked as though the water was to blame for the tint instead of Niles' risqué behavior.  
  
“By your leave, milord, I'll allow you two some...privacy,” Niles breathed. “I'll finish my soaking some other time.” He arched the brow of his blind eye subtly in place of a wink as Leo curtly nodded for his retainer's dismissal. As he left the hot spring to towel off, he could hear Xander speak to Leo in a hushed tone. Whether or not they had been caught mattered little to him, and though he was sure Leo would feel otherwise, at least Niles knew he enjoyed their little escapade.

 


	9. Chapter 9

In the following days, Corrin's troops grew active once more, moving from Mokushu to Izumo in the span of a few days. The intent had been to allow the troops to finish resting in Izumo before moving into Hoshido, but the air of relaxation was quickly soured when the Nohrian royals were confronted by their Hoshidan counterparts. Their time of rest was further hindered by Corrin and Xander's decision to rescue the Hoshidan siblings when Zola revealed himself imitating Archduke Izana and captured their unarmed enemies. How awkward it was - for all involved troops, Hoshidan and Nohrian - to witness crown prince Xander and princess Camilla team up to face off against the two generals guarding their adversaries' prison. How strange it was, to see prince Leo reprimand Zola for his cowardice in front of the royals who had sought to steal away Corrin, to see him flip open Brynhildr and mercilessly summon a tangle of vines to crush Zola's body into nothing.  
  
Some troops averted their heads when the pages of Brynhildr flared to life in Leo's palm and the inorganic vines wrapped around Zola's body. It was enough to hear his screams. His retainers, however, had watched, Odin slack-jawed and in awe of the prince's prowess, Niles with a reflexive hunger for more that he immediately stifled upon seeing his master's face. Leo's eyes were hollow, perhaps even regretful. He took no pleasure in causing the wretched man pain, and though Niles usually landed on the exact opposite end of the spectrum, he felt it distasteful to encourage further damage from his prince.  
  
Leo was quiet for the rest of the evening. Once the true Izana was released, his officials guided the Nohrian troops to their place of staying, with gratitude from both parties. Niles kept a close eye on his master as they made to settle for the night, but Leo seemed detached from even his own siblings that evening. In the meantime, the troops made the most of their evening as they could, companions eating and drinking in small groups throughout the mess hall.  
  
Odin made merry with a grinning Laslow and an evasive Selena, and as Niles' gaze passed his, the dark mage waved him over.  
  
"Come join in our comradery!" he called.  
  
Niles sat next to Laslow and across from the other two as Odin slid him a cold tankard. The dip of red in everyone's faces told him that they'd all had at least one or two each already. Good, he thought. He would be bunking with the fiery mage that evening and knew that alcohol was an effective sedative for him, even in small amounts. Perhaps humoring him by chatting it up with his companions would expel even more of his energy.  
  
"We request your assistance in dispelling an errant claim that's been passing through the vineyard as of late," said Odin, leaning against the table with suspicion.  
  
"Gods' sakes, Odin, speak normally," groaned Selena, knocking the foot of her empty tankard against the mage's head. "Essentially, there's been a rumor about you going around."  
  
Niles drew a deep swallow from his pint as his brow furrowed in feigned thought. Pulling away from his drink and licking his lips, he breathed, "Which one?"  
  
Selena rolled her eyes. "The most recent one, I _guess_. Laslow, you tell him!"  
  
"Why me!?" Laslow retorted.   
  
"Because Odin told you first."  
  
Odin piped up, "Then maybe I could be the individual responsible for--"  
  
"No," snapped Selena. "Laslow will tell him, _won't you_ , Laslow?"  
  
Laslow sighed, and as the three bickered over who would share the rumor, Niles continued to nurse his tankard, this time in actual thought. Normally people were quick to ask verification for some of the disgraceful acts he had committed. Had he offered a night of _that_ with a merchant when the monger wanted to haggle the price of a bushel of fruit? Of course he did. Was it him who called that girl  _this_ when she failed to successfully pickpocket him while in town? No doubt it was him. Had someone heard he threatened to do _those_ things to a new recruit when they picked a fist fight with him after training? Who else could it have been? Now the three sat silently, all eyes on Laslow, as thought this new rumor was far beyond the spectrum of Niles' normal supposed acts.  
  
"Don't be shy," Niles said, genuine curiosity flecking his irises as he joined the eyes on Laslow. "What _baaaad_ thing have you heard people say about me this time?"  
  
"Alright, alright, would all of you just quit staring at me!?" Laslow finally cried. He drummed his fingers against the mess table, either choosing the right words or stalling for more time. He lifted his empty tankard to look inside it - definitely stalling. "I've..." he began, "er, rather, we've...heard that you're..." The red in his face deepened. "We've heard that you're...with Lord Leo."  
  
Niles arched an eyebrow as all eyes in the group moved to him now. A part of him gathered the implications of Laslow's stuttering confession, but the other part of him wanted simultaneously to be completely sure of the implication, and to simply make Laslow say it, out loud.  
  
"I've been Lord Leo's retainer for some time now," he said innocently. "Whatever could be wrong with that?"  
  
Laslow gnarred and slammed a fist onto the table, loudly enough to express his frustration, but not loudly enough to draw more attention. "Don't act daft, I meant that you're _with_ Lord Leo! As in, you're consorting him!" He silently bridled as Niles maintained a blank expression. "M-Maybe you're even servicing him!"  
  
Niles finally broke into a smirk, taking another deep draft from his tankard. That was more like it. "Believe you me," he chuckled, "I'd love nothing more than to please my lord, but I'm not _servicing_ him, as you put it. I am, however...seeing him. What, are you envious?" Laslow blanched. "Envious you weren't invited to the orgy?"  
  
At that, Laslow and Odin were suddenly far more interested in the designs on the table wood than in anything else around them, and Selena faked a dry heave over the side of her bench. Niles took another draft; it was all he could do to keep from laughing, and he knew one of them would be bound to report him if he made any more lewd remarks.

* * *

Leo had excused himself to bed the moment he was able to politely escape the company of his siblings. Niles gave him perhaps an hour of peace, allowing Odin, Laslow, and Selena to discuss literally anything else besides Niles' romance life, before he also pardoned himself to bed. Neither retainer complained of the arrangement, and Niles drifted off into the army's lodge to find Leo's chamber. When he arrived, he noticed the lamp light that poured from beneath the chamber door. Of course his master was still awake. He knocked.  
  
"Come in, Niles."  
  
Niles smirked and entered Leo's chamber, a spacious one-room suite, to find the prince studying away at charts on a desk opposite from the door. He had not turned to acknowledge the retainer, but it didn't matter. Niles closed the door behind him and ambled to the opposite wall, leaning against it so he could at least see the top of Leo's head as the prince's eyes remained glued to his charts.  
  
"Do I visit you so often that you assume I'm always at the door?" Niles asked, the corner of his lip curling up.  
  
"Well, there's that," returned Leo, pausing to finish reading a footnote before regarding his retainer, "and the fact that you visit so often that I now recognize your knocking pattern."  
  
Niles gave a winsome chuckle, and added, "I didn't realize I had my own knocking pattern."  
  
Leo arched an eyebrow at him shrewdly before gesturing to a chair in the corner of the room and offering him to sit. While Niles went to fetch the chair, Leo resumed his reading. The retainer pulled the chair up beside the desk and sat, crossing his ankle over his knee and draping an arm over the chair's back. He knew the prince couldn't stand when he sat in such an undignified manner, and sure enough, though Leo's eyes remained on his charts, his pupils twitched back and forth between the pages and Niles' outlandish posture in his periphery.  
  
" _So_ ," Leo finally said, irritably. "Surely you didn't come by my chambers just to watch me study."  
  
"You're correct, milord," Niles breathed. "I came to see what troubled you this evening."  
  
"...What makes you think I'm troubled?"  
  
"You have a tendency to retire to your chamber early and spend countless hours pouring into books and papers when you're trying to stifle human emotions."  
  
Leo shot his retainer a glare, which only made Niles snort.  
  
"Reading is a healthy coping mechanism to stress, I'll have you know," the prince insisted. "However, yes, I suppose I was bothered by today's events. You were there when I killed Zola, and contrary to popular belief, I do not enjoy killing others. In the heat of battle, my mind is not too occupied by my kill because I'm forced to kill in self-defense. Zola was armed, too, but he begged for his life when I brought forth Brynhildr. He made executing him my personal burden."  
  
Niles said nothing for a long while, instead watching Leo shudder and scrub his palms together as though his own words had dirtied his hands.  
  
"I didn't mean to bring up bad memories of the day, milord, but I understand how you feel," he muttered.   
  
"Well, I imagine every soldier in this army knows the feeling of taking another human's life."  
  
"Yes, but not every soldier in this army knows how it feels to take an innocent's life."  
  
Leo paused. "Zola wasn't innocent," he said stiffly.  
  
"No, he wasn't. But there are others who are killed and don't deserve it."  
  
Niles was mildly fascinated when Leo suddenly stood from his desk and towered over Niles, placing a hand on either side of his chair's back.  
  
"What are you getting at, Niles?"  
  
Niles craned his neck to respond by pecking Leo's lips. Leo in turn backed away from the chair to regard him, befuddled.  
  
"That was quite a provocative stance, Leo," he purred. "But I digress. My point is that I've had to perform more distasteful acts than take a deserving man's life, so I can empathize with your anguish."  
  
"You confound me, Niles."  
  
The retainer stood and hooked an arm around Leo's waist. "Perhaps I can be of assistance in calming you, then," he breathed. Leo huffed a muffled protest as Niles pressed a heavy kiss to his lips, but he was quickly distracted when the retainer's hands creeped into the soft spots of the his armor. Oh, how vulnerable Leo could suddenly become with a few simple flicks of his fingers and the unclasping of a few buckles.  
  
"Your mind is a dangerous weapon," Niles muttered as he broke the kiss. "But only when it has been rested. You should take the rest of the night to relax."  
  
"Now isn't the time..." Leo protested, but his voice caught in his throat as Niles' face nuzzled into the crook of his neck, his hands settling at the base of Leo's pelvis.  
  
Niles hummed sweetly. "Maybe you can show me another dangerous weapon of yours." His fingers shifted aside Leo's tabard to cup the manhood resting beneath his trousers, and at that moment, Leo froze. He would have continued if the pause had not been so violent that he felt it through every fiber of Leo's being.  
  
" _Enough_ ," Leo hissed.  
  
Niles pulled away from his master and watched him stiffen, the red in his irises darkening dangerously from that warm copper to the color of fresh slaughter. His hands tucked behind his back sharply, and if his expression were a sword, Niles would already be bleeding out. He found the view irritably arousing, but knew now was not the time to express himself.  
  
Leo breathed deeply for a time, and though Niles rarely felt uncomfortable, he yearned to break the silence.  
  
"...Milord?"  
  
"Firstly," Leo spat in response, taking a threatening step forward, "how do you expect me to react when you suddenly go from talk of killing innocent people to trying to feel me up!?"  
  
"Yes sir--"  
  
" _Secondly_ , I had the impression we were toying with a 'theory' of yours, and usually in situations similar to your 'theory,' nobody is called 'milord,' and nobody is anyone's 'master' or 'sir,' unless we are discussing specific fantasies!"  
  
"Yes m...I'm sorry. I'm working on--"  
  
Leo growled under his breath, nodding furiously in realization. "Yes, yes, you are working on changing that. After all, you've only known me while serving under me. Of course you wouldn't immediately drop to simple moniker."  
  
Niles' remained emotionless, but with each indoor-appropriate roar of the prince, it became harder to contain his laughter. He had meant to toy with his master, not break him outright. The results were better than he could have ever expected.  
  
"But, thirdly, to compound upon that fact," Leo continued, unabated, "I like to consider myself a prince of Nohr, not a spare body for you to  _fuck!_ "  
  
Finally, the compressed mirth drained from Niles' chest, and he instead adopted a look of remorse. He knew the pang of shame, but was unfamiliar with the expression for the first few moments he wore it upon his countenance. Even as the shame washed over him, however, he maintained eye contact with his master.  
  
"I apologize...Leo...I didn't mean to make you feel used like that..." And he meant it, as strange as it was to think about. "I won't make any more advances on you from now on."  
  
Leo's rage visually subsided at that, and Niles could almost see a tremor rise in the prince's chin, possibly from the crash of an adrenaline rush. He sighed after a few practiced breaths, gestured for Niles to sit, and drew up his own chair from his desk so that, when he too sat, they were knee to knee.  
  
"I...also apologize," Leo said carefully. "I was a bit harsh in my wording, and I lashed out at you." Again, Leo sighed, this time reaching out to the hand on Niles' lap and brushing his fingers against it softly. "May I try again?"  
  
Niles nodded, finding himself strangely fond of the prince's hand.  
  
"Thank you. Let me see...ah. What was your reasoning for bringing up the fact that you had done worse than kill?"  
  
"...When fractions of my past return to me, they almost seem fake. How could I have performed such acts and not have remembered them vividly? Had the trauma forced me to block the memories out? Had I grown so insensitive to the acts that I no longer thought twice about them? I...feel like I inadvertently belittled the pain you experienced when you were forced to execute Zola by mentioning my own. I struggle sometimes to express the pain I've lived through, so sometimes I distort my words. I just wanted you to know that you were not alone in having to shoulder the burden of another's death." He smiled ruefully. "The...feeling you up was a way to divert your thoughts from unnecessary recollection, I suppose."  
  
Leo nodded thoughtfully.  
  
"I appreciate the sentiment. And I apologize for misconstruing your actions. However," he added, firmly, "I do not excuse the actions."  
  
Niles couldn't help but roll his eyes, and thankfully Leo did not catch the gesture as he wracked his mind.  
  
"We need not cover the honorifics. That outcry was just a personal grievance. I apologize for making it seem like you weren't trying."  
  
"How diplomatic you are when attempting to untangle your own verbal temper tantrum," Niles teased, but Leo wasn't listening.   
  
"That just leaves your touchiness," Leo said, the blood in his irises darkening once more.  
  
"I already apologized for that," Niles returned, cocking his head to the side in hopes that his snowy hair would cover his ears, which were now burning. Why was he suddenly feeling so shameful? "I stand by my word. I won't make any advances on you ever again."  
  
"I didn't agree to you  _never_  making advances on me again." Leo blushed, and didn't seem to mind it. "Why do you think I let you have your way with me in the hot spring? You're," he cleared his throat, "adept, to say the least. But you can't just shove your hand into my smallclothes the moment I relent."  
  
"My apologies, mi--ah, Leo. I've...only ever known how to pleasure, or be pleasured. I had to survive during my life as an outlaw, and love was not an emotion I ever had time for."  
  
Leo looked at his retainer with an expression he could not quite read, gradually grasping the hand on Niles' lap.  
  
"Have you ever been in love, Niles?" he asked. "Or, more specifically, have you ever felt love for someone?"  
  
"Not to monger for pity, but I've never even felt platonic love, even from another person."  
  
"That," Leo declared, lifting Niles' hand and clasping it between both of his, "is not true, at least from my end. Even before we began to test your 'theory,' I loved you, in a fraternal sense. I loved you in that I admired you. I loved you in that I respected you. I loved you in that I looked forward to spending time with you. Now that we're testing your 'theory,' I find that I love you in that I want to know you better." Leo released one hand to lift it and tap Niles' forehead and chest with an index finger. "I want to know you here...and here."  
  
As though Leo's touch was magic, the unfamiliar warmth spread through Niles' chest. He was beginning to enjoy the feeling, whether Corrin was right and it _was_ love, or even if it was something else.  
  
"My life is yours, and you've been free to use it as you see fit since the day I swore allegiance to you, so...I suppose I've always felt love for you as well, even if I wasn't aware of it." Niles gestured to himself, experimentally lacing the fingers of his hand in Leo's with the prince's. "I'm not quite sure what my feelings for you are now, but...I've definitely never felt anything like it before. It's a...euphoria. Yes, I admit...I'd love to please you physically, but until you're comfortable with my advances, I can learn how to love you in different ways. Because..." He faltered, his thoughts momentarily dropping as he brought his gaze to his master's. How lucky he was, to have Leo, as a prince, as a companion...as another human being. "Because...I suspect these unknown feelings may indeed be love. I simply need to learn to recognize it."  
  
"That's very sincere of you, Niles," Leo said, his eyelids drooping and lending his expression a sweetness that made Niles' breath nearly catch.  
  
"Only problem, is," Niles winced, "I don't know how to love in any different way."  
  
Leo chuckled, and for a moment Niles thought the laughter was directed toward his confession. The prince's gaze was drifting to the side of the room, however, as though his laugh was caused by some force Niles couldn't see. Then a flush crept up his neck.  
  
"Funny," he muttered, forcefully dragging his gaze back to his retainer. "I face the opposite problem. As a royal, I've always been expected to know the art of courtship like the back of my hand. I've read mountains of guides, I've watched my brother practice in front of a mirror countless times, and I now feel confident in my abilities of simple romance. Copulation, however..." He shook his head, as though the subject playfully exasperated him. "My only experience is in fiction, and it's been years since I've read smut like that."  
  
"I fear you might find my ideas of copulation far more...exotic than what one may find in a book," Niles admitted. He caught the upward hook of Leo's lips. "I've an idea, Leo. You teach me the art of courtship, to the best of your ability and of my tolerance, and I teach you the art of copulation, in the same way. What say you to that?"  
  
To that Leo said nothing, but instead leaned in, ensnaring the retainer in a modest kiss. Niles let his master linger as long as he liked, breathing in the discreet musk that Leo often tried to scrub away in vain when he bathed. In reality, Niles wished that he would let the scent blossom, as he enjoyed catching a hint of it whenever his master passed him by.  
  
When Leo broke the kiss, he remained close, pressing his blond bangs against Niles' white ones.  
  
"I'd love that," he breathed. "Perhaps then we can understand what love is, together."  
  
The sentiment was too much. Niles drew his forehead away from his master's and exhaled deeply from his nose. He had had enough sweetness tonight to give him a cavity. His gaze settled to the his and Leo's fingers laced comfortably on Niles' knee. He squeezed thoughtfully before unlacing his fingers, and stood to make for the chamber door.  
  
"With that, I'll take my leave. After all, good princes should be in bed this time of night." He heard the chuckle from behind him.  
  
"This good prince will only sleep if his good retainer will follow suit."  
  
"You've my word...Leo." He made it to the exit, but paused as his hand reached out for the doorknob.  
  
"Oh, one last thing," he said, turning his head over his shoulder to Leo.  
  
"Mm?"  
  
"Did you...happen to tell anyone? About us?"  
  
Leo regarded his retainer with curiosity, but shook his head.  
  
"No, why?"  
  
"I think people are catching wind - Odin specifically."  
  
It took a moment for Niles' words to settle in, and when they did Leo heaved an exaggerated groaned as his face sank into a palm.  
  
"Oh _gods_ , really?" He paused, then his demeanor swapped immediately from irritated child to calculating tactician as he flipped open a spare notebook on his desk and scribbled in a note. "Guess there's no point in hiding it any longer. Before we march tomorrow, come by my chamber. I'll dispel the rumor before it can spread. I'll simply need to formally introduce you to my siblings."  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"I'll formally introduce you to my siblings - not as my retainer, but as my lover."


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains graphic depictions of violence.

_The boy darted into an alleyway as he and his small group of associates split up. He stopped and hid behind a barrel, listening to the slow crescendo of bouncing metal as a band of armored guards approached. Each set of armor passed the alleyway, and the boy reflexively placed a hand on the sheathed dagger at his hip. Momentary relief washed over him, however, as the metallic sounds began to fade further down the street._

_The boy hazarded a peek over the side of the barrel to make sure no guard was lingering behind to watch for him. The coast seemed clear. He took a moment to catch his breath, crouching in the shade of the barrel, but his eyes darted about constantly. He was still far from safe. In his arms, held tightly against his heaving chest, was a jar perhaps the size of his head, and a mouth-watering volume of honey weighed inside against his arms._

_When the boy and his group had arrived in town that evening, they had had one thing on their minds - food. Their already scant rations were dwindling considerably, and the younger members of the gang were often the last ones to eat, if they were even saved a crumb. The boy wasn't often one for desperation, but he had been working all week to help rekindle the gang's supplies - stealing a piece of bread here, a dangling carrot there - and when his spoils of thievery were feeding others instead of himself, desperation seemed far more justified than starvation._  
  
_One of the older teens suggested they outright nab a fruit cart from the market, but everyone knew how risky it would be, since the market carts were often wheeled indoors during the evening, and they didn't dare attempt to seize something of that size in broad daylight. Then the boy had suggested Costel's Bakery, and everyone's ears had perked up. Costel had one of the most successful bakeries in Windmire, and shop stayed open until nearly dusk due to high demand. Costel was also generous toward children, sneaking them samples of his goods if they behaved in his store. He offered a wide variety of sweet cakes and desserts, breads and rolls, even coffee during the festivals seasons. If they were able to get their hands on just a few items of his, the risk of being caught would be so worth it._  
  
_They struck near closing time for Costel's. There were four of them waiting in the shade across the street, one to act as decoy, and three to swipe as much food as they could stuff into a burlap sack before Costel saw them. The decoy trotted in and asked if Costel could help him decide on some treats for his sick mother. The boy and his two cohorts waited until Costel had his back turned to them before they sneaked across the street and inside, ducking beneath the front of the counter in time for Costel to return his attention to the boy and offer him a few pastries. None of them spotted the two patrolmen further down the street beginning their evening shifts._

 _The decoy feigned consideration before asking if Costel could look in his kitchen for any candied figs, as his mother just looooved those. Costel chuckled and told the decoy to wait a moment while he checked, and the moment he was out of sight, the other three were hard at work scurrying behind the counter and snatching hasty handfuls of sweets and breads into the bag. The delicate outer layer of their spoils squished between their hungry fingers as they grabbed and clutched at the baked foods, but they knew their mouths would not discriminate later on._  
  
_Two of the three were soon tying the bag and making their way back onto the street, licking their sugar-coated fingers, but the boy lingered behind as he spotted a sacred jar on a counter with a wooden honey dipper's handle leaning against it. His morbid curiosity got the best of him, and he quickly lifted the jar's lid to see if there was enough of the golden substance to warrant nabbing it. The honey's viscous surface shining a lazy reflection of the boy with his bandaged eye and watering mouth answered his question for him, and he slid the jar from the counter as silently as he could. He hurried with the decoy outside as footsteps were returning to the storefront, and by the time Costel had come around the corner with a small tray of candied figs, all four bandits were dashing on their way back to their hideout._

 _Their execution had been perfect, their bag had been filled nearly to the brim, and they were going to eat like kings and queens for days, if only there hadn't been two patrolmen ready to meet them outside the bakery. One guard held a child by the scruff of their collar while the other was already shouting for backup, so the remaining three bandits made a run for it. Thankfully the burlap sack was filled with breads instead of heavier foods, so one of the children was able to support the burden with little effort. Splitting up was rarely the best tactic of getting away from the law, but if reinforcements were on their way, they had little choice. The boy only hoped that he and the child with their sweets were able to safely make it back to the hideout in one piece._  
  
_The boy winced and pressed a hand to the bandage on his right eye socket as a fading adrenaline rush caused his already racing pulse to hammer in his head. Even after months without the eye, he still experienced phantom pains, and feared a spasm would suddenly come and cloud his head in agony. Thankfully, however, the pounding subsided after a few deep breaths, and soon the boy was back on his feet, tucking the honey jar inside his cloak to hide it as much as he could. He paused a moment longer to draw a mental map of the area so he could formulate the best plan to get him back to the hideout, and silently slid back into the streets. It was easy to dodge interaction with other people when it was growing so late, and as the looming buildings sheltered him, watching his every sin, the boy wove through the streets._

 _He made it to the outskirts of town and turned a sharp corner around a residential building when he nearly charged into an unsuspecting patrolman. Both individuals were shaken by the sudden interaction, but the patrolman was faster to recover. He grabbed the boy by his cloak and drew his sword with the free hand, shouting for him to drop to the ground. When the boy refused and whipped around to shout an expletive at the guard, the man's sword hand swung, and hit him in the corner of his jaw with the flat of his blade._  
  
_The boy went to the ground, and sucked down a wretch as the hot tinge of blood filled his mouth. While his head swam, his immediate concern was with the condition of his honey jar. He felt around beneath his cloak for it, and his fingers came back sticky. The honey jar lay on its side, thankfully unbroken, but spilling its warm contents onto the cold Nohrian cobblestone. He tilted the jar upright again, but not before the warning sting of a sword tip pressed against his shoulder. The boy remained still, and the patrolman grasped the front of his tunic, lifting his frail body from the ground with ease._

_The patrolman cackled and threatened to end his life._

_He didn't care._

_The patrolman rested his blade at the base of the boy's exposed neck and asked if he was scared._

_He wasn't._

_The patrolman clicked his tongue and thanked the boy for giving him an eventful evening, or at least, what would eventually become an eventful evening._

_He was examining a patch of flesh that peeked out from the man's jaw. Reflexively, he let his limps go limp. The guard laughed and asked if he had given up. He didn't answer. The guard huffed and threatened again to remove the boy's head. The boy's blank eyes locked with the guard's intimidating glare, all the while inching his fingers toward his sheathed dagger. The patrolman growled that he'd had enough with the staring contest._

_It was a good thing, too, because suddenly the guard had the hilt of a dagger jutting from his jugular. The man gurgled as he dropped the boy and stumbled backward before crumpling to the ground like discarded bedding. The boy did not bother to remove his blade, but instead retrieved his jar, and ran. His thighs pumped and he held the honey jar close to his chest, but the streets did not seem to move around him as he fled from his murder. In fact, they only seemed to rewind around him. The boy peeked over his shoulder at the stabbed guard, but the guard was no longer there. Instead, another man lay heaped on the ground. His pleading voice resembled boiling water as fresh blood filled his throat, and he stared at the boy with hollow eyes as he bled out, the red tarnishing his pristine black armor, staining the charming wheat of his hair, blotting his lips as he mouthed a name - his name. Still the boy tried to run, but his legs felt like cotton, like cotton sheets! The sheets were preventing him from moving!_

Niles exhaled as though he had been holding in a breath all night. His legs still pumped for a moment, tangling his feet even further in the bunk sheets. As he gradually came to, he gasped for air, burying his head into his pillow to both stifle the noise and to dry the cold sweat from his brow. That was the third time he'd had that dream this week. He rarely dreamed the same dream more than once at a time, and he rarely remembered the details in his dreams so vividly. A shiver threatened to seize him by the spine as he thought of his prince - his Lord Leo - lying in a heap at his feet as he tried to run, drowning in his own blood. He often wished that he could remember more of his memories, more from his dreams, but if these images were the makeup of his memories, then perhaps he would rather remain in the dark.

When Niles felt confident enough that his breath had evened out, he lifted his head and immediately hooded an eyelid as he watched the unruly mess of Odin's hair peek up from beneath his bunk.

"My musing accomplice finally breaks free from the chains of nightmares," Odin whispered, folding his arms into Niles' disheveled sheets and resting his jaw on the back of one palm. "Your thrashing proved more vigorous than usual, this evening past. I find that sharing one's night terrors helps relinquish hidden vices. Please, won't you tell me of your dream?"

"Well, let's see." Niles carefully pinched his chin between a thumb and forefinger. "I dreamt I was being held as a prisoner of war in Hoshido. You were there, actually, along with many of the other retainers. You, however, were the star of my dream." Odin's eyes lit up, and Niles couldn't held the upward curl of his mouth. "You were an absolute mess, having warded off many an enemy and taken many a blow for your humble comrades. And how surprisingly fitting you looked, hands bound behind your back, dropped to your skinned knees, positively begging to have Prince Ryoma come and ravage you with his c--"

Odin waved a panicked arm. "Okay, okay, I get it," he said in a hushed yelp. "You don't want to tell me your dream, you've made that clear." The dark mage suddenly hesitated and Niles watched in curiosity as Odin's gaze sobered considerably. "In all seriousness, though, I've read that dreaming you've killed a loved one indicates a hidden fear of failing them. You should talk things over, as it'll help you more than you know. Trust me...I've been there." And like night and day, the lost ferocity in Odin's gaze ignited once more. "In the meantime, would you like to hear my dream?" Niles opened his mouth to decline, but Odin's fingers were already hovering over the sheets, sprinkling invisible ash over an invisible dark landscape. "It all started in the middle of a raid to clear monsters for my homeland. I was outnumbered one-hundred to one, completely surrounded by Risen. Their leader loomed over me like Grima himself, eyes shooting fire from beneath his mask. I valiantly--"

"Odin," the sleepy groan of Laslow interrupted from the adjacent bunk, "If you keep telling people about your Risen dreams, I will "risen" from my bunk and come silence you myself...!"

"T'would be all the better, friend mercenary, as you can see only a hand full of troops remain enslumbered."

"That's not even a word, you simpleton," Laslow yawned, rolling over in his bunk and tucking his sheet around his shoulder. "Please let dawn be a few hours away..."

Niles glanced out a nearby window to confirm Laslow's wishes. No sign of dawn had even threatened the horizon, and yet many of Nohr's troops were up and about, packing, performing maintenance checks, heading to the stables, or simply keeping each other company. Niles dropped silently from his bunk as Odin busied himself with prodding Laslow awake. He gathered his belongings, meager as they were, strapped his quiver around his waist, and slid on his boots before sliding out of the barracks. Stepping out into the darkness, he again looked to the sky - the air was clear, as was the great expanse of heavenly bodies peering down at him. _Perfect_.

A quick survey of the landscape when the troops first arrived in Izumo led Niles to believe that most building structures in the area were closely knit and within justification of trespassing, should he find himself on an unwelcome rooftop, so the retainer settled for scaling the wall of the barrack with relative ease, finding ample foot holds even in the foreign style of the building's masonry. Once atop the barrack's flat roof, Niles sat on the edge of the wall, one leg dangling over the side and the other tucked beneath him.

He drank in the void of the night sky, a contrary smirk tugging his lips. The sprinkled stars gleamed at him like fond acknowledgement from an old friend. He never knew how much different the night sky would look in regions near Hoshido. Back in Windmire, people often compared the night to a vicious black grip, one that slowly squeezed around good little households as the sun dipped below the horizon. Only fools or those with devious agendas prowled the streets past sundown, while the others - wise enough to know better or coerced to working late -  were forced to scurry home with great urgency when it grew dark. There, they huddled together with their families, loved ones, or simply clutched their pillows in solitude until the hazy embrace of night dissipated with the rise of the sun.

Here, however, the dark acted as more of a shelter. It draped across the sky like a canvas sheet, a curtain closed upon another act in a play featuring the sun as the lead role. Villagers ambled off the beaten pathways even now, with dawn still having not crowning the hills in the distance. These audience members were simply stretching their legs and conversing with companions in a dim-lit intermission, chattering in hushed voices over the previous act of the play, speculating on how the next act would be performed. While Niles did at times miss the groping hand of Nohrian night, he felt fortunate he was able to view the same sky with a different set of eyes. Childhood him would have never believed he would even be traveling to Hoshido, much less sitting atop a barrack in Izumo.

Then again, childhood him typically held no stance in Niles' mind. In fact, he shouldn't, ever, but he did. He had been dreaming of his childhood more and more frequently, the longer he stayed with his lord, and retained more and more fragments of these dreams as a result. The rise in frequency concerned him very little - he had had dreams of his childhood since long before he even trespassed in Castle Krakenburg that fateful day. The retainment, however, concerned him greatly. Even now, leaning a hand against a knee that swung idly off the side of the building, brow slowly knitting in contemplation, he remembered peeking over a shoulder to catch a glimpse of Costel's expression as he emerged around to the counter, his face dropping from warm amusement to disappointment, sadness - betrayal. He remembered the wave of panic that pierced him when he held the pot of honey to his chest, hoping with every fiber of his being that he would not be spotted in the alleyway. He remembered peering back at who was supposed to be the bleeding patrolman, and instead locking faded eyes with--

"I thought I told you to come to my chamber this morning," came the familiar voice of Leo, violently stirring Niles from his reverie. He dropped his gaze to find the prince offering an almost lazy expression and nursing a cup of what he assumed was coffee. Niles dropped from the roof, expertly catching a few of the jutting foot holds with his heel to control his descent speed, and landed before the prince with a crouch. He met Leo's lazy gaze wryly, mentally noting how unprepared the prince looked to be traipsing around. He wasn't even buckled into his armor yet, instead merely adorned in his black polo neck pullover and riding breeches.

"My apologies," Niles smiled, crossing his arms in spite. "When you said to report to you, I didn't think you meant immediately upon waking up."

"I simply jest," Leo softly snorted, taking an inappropriately deep draw from his cup. The biting smell of caffeine nearly wafted from him - definitely coffee. 

"Usually when one jests, they make the _face_ of jest as well." At that, Leo's face may have twitched in ghost annoyance, but Niles wasn't sure.

"I'll try being more light-hearted later, then," he mumbled. "It's far too early to make any sort of face." Leo considered his coffee cup on its saucer as if he was contemplating taking another undignified gulp. Finally, he sighed away from the idea and instead gestured to the barrack roof with a tilt of his head. "What were you doing up there, anyway? Admiring the stars?"

"Partially," Niles admitted. "I was also thinking." The retainer fought to not avert his eyes as Leo's expression shifted to expectancy. He knew his lord wanted him to elaborate, but, for reasons he couldn't quite put a finger on, he hesitated.

"Niles," Leo breathed, voice soft and sober through increasing wakefulness. "I understand your reluctance, but please trust me."

"I trust you with my life mi-Leo," Niles blurted, far more defensively than he intended. Still, the prince closed his dreamy eyes and sipped from his cup.

"Then, please, tell me what you were thinking about."

Niles' jaw was set beneath his skin, but he knew Leo was right. He had agreed only last night to the prince's idea of teaching him the ways of courtship, and it was obvious that an important factor of courtship was openness toward one another. "I've..." he began, pausing to choose the right words. "You're aware of my dreams, yes?" His master nodded, lifting his cup to take another sip. "I've been remembering more and more from my dreams as of late." Leo's brow cocked in confusion.

"Pardon my interruption, but isn't that a good thing? Aren't those dreams usually fragments of your memory?"

"I would have thought so," Niles added with a nod, "but as most of my dreams come in the form of nightmares, the memories are now plaguing me. I can now see...things I didn't want to. I remember images that I never knew I wanted to blot out of my mind." Niles unclenched fists that he didn't realize were balled up. "And you...you're even in my dreams now, integrated into my distorted memories. Last night I dreamt of when I killed for the first time and that dying guard became you. And before we arrived in Mokushu, I dreamt of a winter in Windmire so bitter that I requested to share body heat with a cohort I hated just to avoid frostbite. That man became you as I huddled next to him."

Leo's hand met his back, a thumb soothingly stroking the space between his shoulder blades. Tension eased gradually in Niles' upper torso, his neck, his shoulders, even his back all relaxing beneath his prince's touch. Leo regarded him with a smile as though he could feel the change in the retainer's whole body through just that one hand.

"I have a suggestion," Leo said, his thumb lazily drawing circles on Niles' back before drawing away to tenderly grasp his wounded bicep. "My arm isn't completely healed, but there's not much more that Elise can do with a stave, so she's been applying a balm each night to soothe an infernal itch the wound's caused me. I could have her give me her supply and let you apply it in her stead. It takes a fair amount of time to apply, so you can practice talking through these nightmares of yours. It may not stop them, but...perhaps giving your memories a voice will help put the nightmares into perspective." Niles stared at the barrack wall as his master spoke, silently turning the idea over in his head. Even in his limited periphery, he saw Leo shuffle uneasily at his side, and continue, "Would you at least like to try it, and if you feel it too painful, we can stop? I know we could simply meet in my chambers to do this, but I think having you apply the balm would be a good way to keep your fingers busy."

At that, Niles tilted his head in Leo's direction and eyed him suggestively. Leo grimaced, his cheek suddenly bursting with red. "Gods, I meant keep you focused physically on a task so you would feel more comfortable opening up to me! I didn't mean it necessarily like _that_!"

Despite Leo's defense, a low chuckle rose in Niles' chest, his mind snagging on the prince's addition of the word "necessarily" in his statement. "Bonding emotionally over physical touch," he declared amidst his laughter. "How unlike you."

Leo growled and polished off his cup with one final gulp, but made no further defense. His brows furrowed in seriousness, however, as he asked, "Would you honestly be willing to try my method, though?"

"I'll try it," Niles responded. "As I said, I trust you with my life, so I also trust that you'll keep everything I say confidential."

"Of course."

"You won't even tell your siblings?"

"You have my word. Oh!" Leo started, his eyes darting to the lodge Izana had arranged for the Nohrian royals to stay in. He grasped Niles' hand and began leading him toward the building. "Speaking of which, we have matters to attend to."

His pace was brisk as he led the retainer away, causing the cup and saucer in his other hand to occasionally rattle between his fingers. "Are you nervous?" he asked over his shoulder.

"I've no reason to be," Niles shrugged. "Your siblings are well aware of my disposition. Whether or not they like me will fall to the wayside when they remember that I'm also your retainer."

"That may the case for Xander and Corrin," Leo said carefully, "but Camilla and Elise may scorn you, if you're not careful." 

"Ah, I meant to ask you," Niles said, noting the subtle tightening of Leo's grip on his hand. "You said that Elise's balm takes time to apply. Why is that? Your wound was never very gaping to begin with."

Leo slowed briefly, and Niles caught a glimpse of his scholar's eyes glimmering. "It's a medicine made from the leaf of a plant native to the Flame Tribe. The leaf has natural cooling properties, and when Elise prepared the balm, she implemented those properties to the medicine. If applied in multiple layers, the balm will "freeze over" the affected area, numbing it for a period of time without actually freezing the skin. She got the leaves from Kaze. He possesses surprising knowledge of natural medicine."

Leo dropped off into silence as they entered the lodge and, after Leo deposited his saucer onto a nearby table, began winding through its ornate halls. Niles glanced about with feigned disinterest at the foreign styled decor, the trim on the walls etched with meandering designs, the potted plants and flowers he didn't recognize peeking from every corner, the paintings of richly colored landscapes and individuals in silken robes that seemed far too big on them.

"Should be eating breakfast by now," Leo muttered to himself as the pair came upon a set of double doors. Leo parted them with hands that almost weren't shaking, and revealed a spacious room in which sat a dining table similar in style to the one Niles was used to seeing in Castle Krakenburg. This one, however, was perhaps half the size of the one in Nohr, and seeing each of Leo's siblings eat so close together seemed strangely intimate, like a family eating at a pub table.

"Good morning," Leo greeted his siblings, and all four of them immediately paused in their actions of chewing or cutting or lifting food to their mouths. Their expressions revealed to Niles the rest. Leo was not typically so cordial in the morning.

"Good morning, Leo," Xander responded after a moment, his brow knit more than usual. "And good morning, Niles. What brings you here?" Niles noted casually that each sibling's eyes were on him. In fact, he had to admit that he felt out of place being in the dining room. While, yes, on occasion he and his fellow retainers would accompany their lords or ladies to meals as guards, they often stood watch outside, behind closed doors, acting as first response to prevent an intrusion. Not to mention that Izumo, being a neutral nation, employed its own watch team for the siblings, so while the retainers were likely nearby, they were probably back at the barracks, helping to make preparations to leave.

"Actually, this is my doing," Leo spoke, tucking his arms behind his back to keep from wringing his hands. Niles gave his prince a sideways glance, concealing a smirk. He had asked if Niles was nervous, but perhaps he should have spoken for himself. "I have an announcement to make."

"Well, go on," Xander encouraged, and the rest of his siblings adjusted to give him their full attention, placing cutlery back on their napkins and shifting in their seats to look at him better.

"Very well." Leo swallowed and focused his gaze somewhere in the distance. "This has...been in the making for a time, now, and I'd...like to declare it now so that no rumors begin to spread later on." Standing slightly behind him, Niles could see his hands flexing and relaxing, flexing and relaxing around his clasped wrists behind his back. A giggle rose from Camilla's corner of the table, and the lavender-haired princess rested a cheek on her knuckles.

"Oh, come on, Leo, just tell us," she cooed. "It's dreadful to keep others in suspense."

Leo hummed irritably, his fingers tightening around his wrists until his knuckles paled. Finally, he licked his lips, and said, "You all know Niles, my retainer." He gestured, and Niles lifted a hand in acknowledgement. "He and I are, as of today...lovers."

Niles swore he could have heard a mouse skitter across the floor at the silence that filled the room. Then, Camilla lifted her head from her hand delicately and said, "Oh, was that your announcement?" Leo froze where he stood, but his siblings all began to settle back into their original positions at the table. Elise was already digging back into her breakfast with her fork, and Camilla was not far behind, gesturing to Leo with a butter knife. "We all had a hunch, dear Leo, there's no need to tense up like a frightened squirrel."

"Y-You mean y-you're in favor of the ar-rrangement?" Leo stuttered, trying to regain his composure. Camilla simply laughed in response. Elise hurried to chew her food, still somehow appearing dignified as she swallowed hard.

"He's constantly staying behind in your chambers after everyone's left," she chirped. "What's else is he doing in there with you, reading you bedtime stories?"

"You've looked so much more at ease, lately," Corrin added, waiting until his siblings were all resuming eating to follow suit. "Both of you, in fact. It makes me happy, so long as you're both happy."

"I also find no objection to your affair," Xander said, but shifted his gaze from Leo to Niles as a concerned frown pulled at his lips. "Just know, Niles, that your retainer duties are not expected to falter just because of your special arrangement." His knife paused in its cutting of a portion of chicken. "I want your word that you'll still continue to protect my brother like you always have, so long as this war is still raging. Are you able to commit to such responsibility?"

Niles met Xander's hardy gaze without waver. The crown prince's expression held no threat, only the desire for absolute devotion. Niles knew that he loved his brother, and would do anything he could to ensure his safety. The fact that he was not forbidding his and Leo's budding romance outright showed how in favor he was of them. Niles spoke, confidently, "I would rather be speared through and left to die like a dog than see a single hair on Leo's head disturbed." He ignored the look of outrage that tore across Leo's face, and instead focused on the way Xander's features relaxed, on the way his knife continued to saw through his breakfast. The crown prince was satisfied with his devotion - there was nothing left for him to fear, not even death itself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Xander. I love Leo and Niles, but man, Xander's great.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: This chapter contains smut. Beware the line break.

"Good evening, Niles. Might I ask what you're making?"

Niles' eye flicked upward long before his head finally lifted to meet Prince Xander's downward stare. He cradled a mess of leather stands, having draped a few of the strings over one knee with the rest measured out carefully in his slender fingers. His work was stopped in the middle of adjusting the length of a single strand on one side. Niles did not answer at first, instead reaching into his right boot whilst his free hand firmly held the leather strands in place and emerging from the shoe with a small metal clip that, to Xander, may have resembled a woman's barrette. 

"More of repairing than anything," Niles breathed, clamping the leather strands neatly together inside the clip and moving his work from his lap so he could properly regard the prince. He tried hard not to smirk at Xander's stance in front of him - arms neatly tucked behind his back in the same fashion that Leo usually did. "I've not had much time lately to maintain the tassels on our horses' saddles."

"Those tassels are your work?" Xander asked, cocking an eyebrow with intrigue. "I know you're practiced on horseback, but I thought you didn't ride."

Instead of nodding, Niles leaned back on his bench and crossed his arms in response. "I don't make these because I...ride," he said, focusing on gesturing with a finger to his work so Xander didn't hear the stammer in his voice. Such a perfect opportunity for innuendo had fallen into his lap, but Leo would kill him if he angered the prince through such vulgar means. "It makes them happy to be decorated. Also reminds some of them of a riding whip, which helps keeps the more aggressive ones in line. Not many soldiers think of the morale of their steeds." He combed a hand through his snowy mop before standing from his bench. "Now, what can I do for you? The crown prince does not usually saunter about, bonding with his sibling's retainers."

"You are correct," Xander said. "You're surely aware of the war council being held this evening. While we still have some time beforehand, I'd like you to spar with me."

Niles paused as Xander spoke. His arms remained crossed, body still facing the prince, but his head mentally swiveled back to his bench where his gifted bow from Leo rested, cleaned and ready for his next battle, and a hand mentally reached down to make sure his quiver at his waist, having been fully stocked before the troops left Izumo.

"With all due respect," Niles started, his voice dipping, "why would an archer spar with the wielder of the mighty Siegfried?"

"Because, just as you said, I do not tend to converse idly with others." Xander untucked his arms and brandished a blunted bronze sword. He held the hilt in one hand, letting the flat of the blade rest in his other palm, as though he was presenting the sword as a gift instead of as a lowly practice weapon. He gestured toward the sword with a nod of his head, the deep creases in his brow suppressing a fondness that Niles almost didn't catch. "I'd like our blades to speak for us."

The retainer took the blade gingerly, weighing it in his palm and tilting it from various angles as to gain a better feel for its movements. "Very well, I'll spar with you," he agreed, looking away from the blade and up to the prince as his thumb carelessly slid along the blade's edge to test its sharpness, a small flutter of satisfaction thrumming in his hand as the blade soon sliced open his skin. "However..." The prince waited patiently for elaboration, his expression unmoving even as Niles brought the cut on his thumb to his lips, licking it clean. "I ask that you not use Siegfried when we spar."

Finally Xander's face bloomed into emotion. He chuckled, a gentle sound that sharply contrasted his usually booming commands on the battlefield. "Of course I won't use Siegfried," he said soothingly, his lips pulling into the subtlest of grins. "It would cut through that blade like it were parchment. No, I'll also use a bronze sword. Now, shall we?"

Niles followed the crown prince to the small clearing the troops had reserved in camp as their training environment. The path had grown narrow and mountainous as Corrin's army drew closer to the Wind Tribe, so the training area resembled a small arena, surrounded on many sides by a half-circle of crags and towering boulders, where various troops would sometimes climb and rest to watch their companions fight.

While Xander parted ways with the retainer to fetch his own bronze sword, Niles watched Silas and Effie prod each other back and forth along the arena's perimeter with Gunter following in their wake, barking directional commands behind them. Niles was not unfamiliar with training, or even sparring with melee weapons. His expertise, however, was nearly exclusive in Corrin's army, and as a result Niles was under-supplied for training, as setting aside space for a mini archery range would, in all honesty, waste room that could be used for more commonly needed equipment. He didn't mind, of course; he would rather hone his skills with activities like hunting than piercing a padded target over and over. Occasionally, Niles would indulge in a thought of hindsight: What if Lord Corrin had spared the thief Shura back before the troops had arrived in Mokushu? Would the army's training arrangement be different then, with two archers to contend with?

A set of feet raced forward from behind Niles, the crunch of gravel and ancient soil smothering beneath steel boots, and the retainer wheeled about, his bronze sword shielding his face from one of its twins as Xander swung down upon him in a wide arc. Niles leapt backward to distance them, but Xander pressed forward with each of his reverse movements. He handled his blade clumsily, parrying each of Xander's assaults and backing himself step by step, or shifting to circle around the crown prince when he got too close to a rock wall. The sword felt foreign in his palm. He kept making to twist his wrist this way and that to hold the weapon more comfortably, but couldn't find a good hold on the hilt. His teeth gritted behind his lips - Xander was even going easy on him. What good would sparring do to make them bond if he was unable to perform with even a novice level of skill?

"Hold," Xander commanded, waiting for Niles' growing tension to ease before lowering his blade. "You know you can't simply defend forever. Why do you not come at me?"

"Oh, I _would_ ," Niles huffed, wiping a layer of beading sweat from his brow with the back of his free hand. "But you know I am no swordsman."

"Perhaps," Xander admitted, "but I've seen you work with daggers. A sword, in some ways, is simply a heavier dagger." The prince shifted his hold on his sword, holding the hilt upside down to where the blade formed an oblong fold against his forearm. It looked strange, seeing Xander hold the bronze sword like a ninja would hold a kunai. "Holding a sword like a dagger is fruitless, as one has more length to deal with in a sword. Plus, one must consider that, while a dagger serves better to stab or to throw, a sword serves better to slice." The sword flipped in Xander's hand, wielding it properly once more, and he formed a slow and exaggerated arc with the blade, one that eventually met with a soft clang at Niles' sword as the retainer blocked. "Why do you think I'm swinging at you versus jabbing?"

Xander's blows resumed, but at a slower pace than before. He allowed Niles ample time to block, to find an opening in his deliberate positioning, and to parry his blade so he could finally begin returning blows. Instead of simply backing the retainer against various walls in the training space, Niles and Xander skirted around each other slowly, dancing along the training floor. Xander was quick to settle from the stance of a teacher to the stance of an equal. With each glance into the prince's eyes in search of his next predicted move, Niles caught subtle glimpses into Xander's mind. With each biting ring of bronze on bronze, Xander's stance, his expression, even his bated cries of combat, all spoke to Niles of his story.

The prince shifted a heel to dig his boot into the dirt as Niles attempted to rush him with a push from his blade. Xander caught the blade with his own in such a way to where he could pull Niles' sword from his hands with a swivel of his wrist, but Niles held tightly to his hilt, and Xander's eyes blazed. They blazed with unease, with the grief of shouldering the burden of Nohr's war. The blaze attempted to hide a fear behind its fiery walls - what would the outcome of this war hold? Would he survive to see it to the end? Niles darted backward as the prince crouched low and swiped horizontally with his blade, a focused roar ripping from his throat. His roar rang through the training arena, resonating with frustration, with concern. He wished these were sounds he could express to his father, loathe as he may be to stand up against King Garon. He knew an inevitable confrontation with the king awaited him in the near future, and the outcome would wound him to the core, regardless of what that outcome would be. This entire war and all of its consequences may have not been his fault, but he was the target of nearly every Hoshidan finger. He was merely a puppet on his father's strings, as far as Garon was concerned.

Niles kept his sword raised as Xander was suddenly the one to step back. The prince, in turn, lowered his sword to his side. His golden ringlets clung to his damp forehead, his black armor scuffed here and there with clay or gathering dust from the ground below them. Though a few smoldering embers remained in his irises, his gaze had sobered. In fact, he looked positively human. In that moment, he was merely a soldier in Corrin's army, not the untouchable crown prince. 

Xander shot the retainer an upward curl of the lip and held out his hand to take Niles' weapon. The retainer paused. There was little doubt in his mind that the prince had caught a few glimpses into his own head and his resolve through his swordplay, shaky as it may have been.

"We'd best finish," Xander said. "Before we depart for the meeting, I have one question for you."

"What's that?" Niles asked, turning his blade in his hands unfamiliarly and letting the prince take it by the hilt. Even with the green lower class swords in each of his hands, Xander commanded the presence of a god.

"Why do you love Leo?"

The question struck Niles strangely. He hadn't asked _Do_ you love Leo, but _Why_ , and the retainer was reduced speechless for a moment. As if reading his mind, Xander offered him a smile.

"I know why Leo loves _you_ ," he soothed. "He speaks of you often, and fondly. You make him feel...worthy, I suppose, of being a Nohrian prince." Xander turned to wander off the training grounds, and Niles followed. The blades found their way onto a hanging rack, where they would be later cleaned, possibly polished, and stored away. Xander kept an eye over his shoulder as he walked. "I also have no doubt that you love Leo. Your actions and devotion speak volumes. I personally feel confidence in your combat prowess, your ability to protect him, and I know he does, too. But why do you love him? What draws you to him?"

It surprised Niles at how little he resisted to answer. Was it perhaps the vulnerability that he had experienced while sparring with Xander, the strike of metal against metal exposing their minds, their ambitions, and their fears to each other? Was it Xander's equally broken nature? Niles despised when others took for granted their positions in life, especially when those positions implied luxury or materialism, but with that peek into Xander's mind, Niles saw who Xander really was - a prince on the cusp of kingdom surrounded by thousands of clawing, greedy hands, each demanding his life, or his attention, or his aid. Or was it maybe that spending time with Leo had begun softening him, had been chipping away at his fortress-like walls to where he found he had no choice but to trust the members of his family that he held so dear?

...It was likely the latter. It had to be the latter.

"Leo inspires me," he declared, shifting his inward mortification at his boldness aside to mull upon at a later time. "He accepts me for who I am, with all the hanging accoutrement of my past that I am forced to drag about each day. He sees past my filth, nurtures me like I were as clean of heart as the day I spilled from my mother's womb. You..." Niles snorted. "You might even say he encourages me to be a better human being, not just to him, but to those around me. He's...just the person I needed to help make my life worth living."  _Not to_ mention _all that tight skin he's been hiding beneath his armor all this time._

Xander gradually failed to hide a beam of pride as the pair strode off in the direction of the war council's tent. Niles suppressed the urge to roll his eyes. There was no doubt that his words would eventually reach Leo's ears, not with a fond expression like that which glowed on Xander's face. It would take some time for him to live those words down. Leo and his siblings truly did treasure each other, as strangely as they may interact with one another.

* * *

A gust of wind struck Leo's tent, some of it slipping through the flaps of tent's door and filling the inside with an unseasonable chill. Niles paused in his work of coating the scabbed wound on Leo's bicep and made to stand and better secure the tent's flaps. A hand on his arm, however, stopped him, and as the retainer looked back at his master, Leo was already reaching from across the edge his cot for his divine tome lying on his nightstand's edge.

"That won't be necessary," Leo said, unfolding the tome in one hand and watching with a light smile as the pages turned on their own, a steady stream of fluttering paper, even as the pages were exposed to the creeping breeze outside. Leo searched each page of Bynhildr as it rapidly passed, his understanding of the tome apparent and intimate, and was...that a flash of mischief in his eyes? "I'll make sure the tent's door is secured shut. While I find the right spell, please tell me about what you dreamed last night."

Niles gradually resumed his work, dabbing the end of a cloth into a small container of Elise's balm and smearing its contents onto Leo's wound whenever the prince's arm stilled from the evocation of magic. As Leo sat rigid on the edge of his cot, his tongue prodded from his lips to wet his mouth idly, and for a moment, Niles found himself too distracted to speak. While the retainer would rarely admit it, he enjoyed discovering the many habits of his prince, particularly if they proved enticing. The tongue waved back and forth like and inverted pendulum, like the contented flick of a cat's tail, until Leo shot his retainer a glance to ask an explanation for his silence, and the tongue retreated to be replaced by a hint of teeth in a pleased grin. Niles inhaled deeply, allowing Leo to return his attention to his tome.

"There was a time," he finally began, "when one the gangs I once ran with successfully plundered a great sum of gold from a merchant's mansion. I don't remember who he was, but the heist was so successful, and the sum we brought back to our hideout was so immense, that our leader decided to split up our fortune amongst everyone who participated in the heist. Equally."

"That's awfully... _generous_ of him," Leo muttered. "Please, continue." His index finger slid along a page in his tome as he read his desired spell. Then, after waiting for Niles to finish his latest layer of the balm on his arm, the air between the tip of his nose and his tome warped and grew a shade of night blacker than pre-dawn as he muttered his spell in a tongue Niles couldn't even begin to comprehend.

"It would have been generous," Niles continued, "uncharacteristically so, if only his conditions for splitting our profit were pure. When I say he split the fortune equally, I mean he distributed the same amount to those who took on the dirty work as he did to the lazier or less experienced gang members who sat in the distance, not even volunteering to keep watch." A inaudible rumble shook beneath Leo's tent at that moment, and Niles turned from his master to watch the spell work at the tent flaps. Great, broad tendrils of green vines erupted from the canvas of the tent's flooring, yet the canvas seemed untouched by the plants. The tendrils coiled up the tent flaps, seeming to pin them closed on either side of the tent, until Niles was confident that not even a cyclone could stir the tent's flaps. He continued, "Understandably, those of us who worked far harder than the others felt this arrangement was unreasonable, so we took to our own measures to make sure we received our fair share."

"By way of 'taxing' the less worthy, I imagine," Leo snorted.

"Precisely," Niles nodded, setting aside the balm so he could spread a few fingers over the newest layer of salve on Leo's skin. The ghost of a flinch passed beneath where Niles touched and the retainer fought to maintain his expression. Despite countless treatments from his sister, the wound still remained tender to the touch. Perhaps Leo had sustained nerve damage in his injury. Niles hoped not, but he had to admit that sensing that flinch each time made him occasionally want to press his fingers into the affected skin, perhaps even raise a pained groan from his master. "You were in this dream, as well. You were with me and the few others who decided to essentially rip sacks of gold from the hands of the younger bandits."

"I feel like I would make an awful thief in that scenario," Leo chuckled. Niles couldn't help but smirk in return, but not before he sank a fingernail into the skin beneath the icy salve on Leo's wound. The prince's breath hitched, his laughter cutting short, his features scrunched in amusement flashing with momentary shock. The sight stirred a hunger within Niles' core.

"Easy, easy," Leo tutted, his hand moving to hover over the scarring tissue. "It may be all but healed, but it's still sensitive."

Niles didn't respond immediately, instead letting his eye drift lazily across the lines that Leo's arms drew across his torso and over the bed. The prince had unbuttoned his nightshirt and let his wounded arm slip free of the loose, flowing fabric to give Niles clean access to his bicep. Though Leo still sat modestly on his cot while Niles worked at his wound, only that bit of skin showing on purpose, his retainer's eyes were already wandering. His collarbones deepened as he let his formality slip and gradually his shoulders shifted to let his neckline features sharpen in the dim lantern light of his tent. Niles swallowed - he could practically drink from those collarbones. He reached out a tentative hand.

"You _would_ be an awful thief if you made yourself so susceptible to pain," he breathed, his index and middle fingers hooking around the nearest clavicle. A flush spread across Leo's cheeks, but as Niles tenderly drew the prince closer by his collarbone, he caught a hint of defiance in his gaze. "Besides, surely you have more sensitive body parts than your wound."

"Of...course I do," Leo insisted, and in an attempt to ignore the innuendo, added, "though I'm sure I could hold my own as a thief with a tome."

"Ah, but most thieves don't use tomes," Niles said, tapping Brynhildr on Leo's lap before carefully moving it back to the nightstand. "They can afford neither the luxury of a teacher, nor a tome to teach themselves. If they prefer to avoid using handheld weapons, they simply use countermeasures."

"What, like fist fighting? That seems so...uncouth."

"Perhaps, but having one's hands free provides benefits." Niles stood to half-straddle Leo's lap, one leg folding to tuck against the prince's hip, and the other invading the space between Leo's knees. His fingers jabbed and pinched gently into a few of Leo's pressure points, his ulnar and radial nerves, his jugular notch, his solar plexus, all while smirking to himself as Leo jolted and squirmed ticklishly. "One can subdue their attacker or victim with their bare hands, or even, say, render them _helpless_ to resistance."

Leo's skin beneath his fingers grew hot at that. Niles felt Leo's forehead brush his own, but the retainer remained still. He searched the prince's eyes, two rings of mahogany, shifting and searching his own gaze in the shade of their entwined bangs, until Leo's eyes screwed shut in annoyance.

"Oh, come now," he growled. "That was a blatant invitation. I know you can only tease so much until your words go from provocative to vulgar." He stabbed Niles clean through with a scowl as the retainer chuckled deeply, and Niles only pushed further by craning his neck and bringing his lips just close enough to Leo's for them to brush, yet not meet.

He softened his voice to nearly a whisper as he mouthed against Leo's lips, "I seem to recall promising you no more unwelcome advances."

Leo gritted his teeth, hissed with enunciation, " _Fine_ ," and then Niles was set ablaze. Leo's mouth assaulted his, drawing him in forcefully with each contraction of their lips until their incisors collided, over and over. Niles let his weight slowly push Leo back onto his cot, but even then, Leo struggled to roll himself on top, to maintain control of their kiss. His jaw and neck rolled and rotated, experimentally prying Niles' mouth open in this angle, allowing his tongue to drift in and explore the retainer's mouth in that way, warming his skin with forceful exhales through his nose here, and there.

Niles basked in the affection, growing quickly obsessed with how little time Leo allowed their lips to part, giving him such a small window of time to inhale before a new wave of kisses flooded him. He busied his hands with the task of roaming Leo's body, slipping them beneath the loose fabric of his nightshirt and trailing heat on Leo's skin wherever his fingertips led. A hushed moan erupted from the prince each time Niles found his nails digging into a particular length of muscle on Leo's back, his side, or his arms. Those nails then clawed as they moved on, as though Niles meant to rip those very muscles from Leo's bones. The prince could merely shudder above him, his snarls muffled against Niles' mouth as he resisted to pause in his work. Then Niles' curious hands found Leo's small clothes, sliding inside to paw at the hardened length inside, and Leo finally lifted his head to cry out in bliss.

The retainer wrapped his swollen lips around Leo's collarbone, sucking and nipping at the skin as Leo panted above him, his hips rocking against the hand on his cock. Niles chuckled against Leo's neck as the prince shifted and wedged his thigh up to his groin, grinding it in time with the rhythm of his hips. Niles withdrew from Leo's smallclothes just enough to hook a finger around the waistband.

"Shall I prepare you?" he uttered, gazing up at the prince and wrestling with his breath to maintain a steady pulse as Leo's thigh continued to coax his thickening erection. The waistband slowly fell, and Leo's eyes sheepishly averted.

"I...have nothing with me."

Niles' eye drooped impassively as he gestured with a tilt of the head to the nightstand. "Well, there _is_ the balm." Leo's line of sight whirled back to him incredulously, and Niles couldn't help but offer him a vulpine smile.

" _I will throw you from this tent_."

"Very well - there are other ways," Niles relented, his voice contrived, and he waited for Leo to slide off of him and remove the rest of his night clothing. As Niles moved to undress himself, however, Leo placed hands over his to stop him. He shot the prince an inquisitive look.

"Please," Leo cooed, surprisingly chill fingers moving beneath his tunic, "Let me." Niles' clothing peeled from his body in what seemed like a dream. Leo's hands warmed quickly against the retainer's flushed skin, making his touches light and fleeting as he picked away at Niles' thin layers. It almost felt wrong, being undressed. Not only was he used to being the the one undressing his bed companion - not to mention he found the switch of roles quite exposing - but having his master, his prince be the one revealing his body felt like some forbidden pleasure, an event only whispered about for the sake of scandal.

As Leo crawled back on top of the retainer, he sighed with a pleased grin, straddled on Niles' groin with hands that spread and fingers that trailed his torso, following the raised scars that decorated his chest like roads on a map. Niles interrupted the prince's wandering hands with a thrust of his hips that tipped Leo's body and head forward, leading his face dangerously close to Niles'.

"It's quite refreshing to see you so aggressive," Niles rumbled, raising a hand to stroke at Leo's cheek. The prince blushed at the sentiment and opened his mouth for the three fingers that prodded experimentally between his lips. Niles slid the fingers in and out of Leo's mouth as the prince's suckled, coating the digits with his tongue.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Leo insisted once the fingers withdrew from his mouth, trailing a thin string of saliva with them that made him wipe his lips in mortification. Niles' hand slid down between the two men's bodies, pausing at Leo's length to give it a reassuring stroke before reaching farther so he could test a finger at Leo's entrance. The prince immediately tensed up at the touch, but as Niles made to withdraw his hand, Leo shook his head violently, his blonde locks tossing about. "N-No...I'm just nervous. Please..."

Niles hesitated for a moment to rub his fingers together, making sure they were lubricated to his satisfaction, before returning to Leo's entrance, sliding a finger inside. Leo winced, his bangs hanging messily over his face, but he shifted gingerly so he could press his lips to Niles', the kiss far more chaste than before. Niles waited for Leo's walls to ease around his finger before he began to pump it slowly, listening carefully to the prince's groans against his mouth for confirmation. He broke the kiss gradually.

"How is it?" he whispered into Leo's ear before nibbling on his earlobe. Leo gradually relaxed, only jolting about whenever the finger found a particularly sensitive spot along his walls.

"It's quite a bit, isn't it?" the prince responded, his breath beginning to pick back up.

Niles laughed, a quiet, rolling sound like distant thunder, and he slid a second finger inside of his prince. "I fear I may overwhelm you, then."

"Nonsense," Leo gasped, his body hitching with the new intrusion. "I'm simply...inexperienced."

"It won't do to have you in pain, however, as much as I'd love to contort that pretty face of yours," Niles breathed, shifting his hand to slide his third finger inside and pumping with a bit more gravitas now. Leo's back arched above him, and the sight made Niles' core positively churn. He wanted nothing more than to watch the scholarly Prince Leo of Nohr ride him like a feral horse. "Knowing how kinky my prince can be might send me overboard." The fingers suddenly stopped. "You _will_ tell me if you ever feel pain, won't you?"

Leo practically whimpered at the retainer's still fingers. He regarded Niles beneath his bangs, his exposed skin bright red, and muttered, "Of course I will. But I still trust that you'll guide me." The prince lifted himself on his knees, the fingers sliding from his entrance as a result. "As I told you, I'm...inexperienced." Leo's hand found the base of Niles' cock, and he positioned himself above it, teasing its tip against his entrance. A soft growl stirred in Niles' chest as Leo's gaze smoldered down on him like molten glass, and his tip pressed inside of Leo as the prince's hips lowered.

A white heat burned the edge of Niles' vision at the tightness around him. The prince pressed, far more confidently than Niles thought was possible, farther down his length, convulsing with every inch. Niles was struck with great conflict - he relished the prince's crumpled expressions, pulsed inside of him at every snag of his breath, and yet a slightly larger part of him feared for his safety, would never forgive him if he were to hurt his lover.

"There's no need to force yourself," Niles managed, steadying the hands that ached to grip either side of Leo's hips and mercilessly widen him over and over around his cock by instead resting them on his thighs. It surprised Niles when Leo responded with a quirk of the lips and a competent snort.

"And yet you _enjoy_ these reactions of mine, don't you?" he hissed. He leaned backward, using Niles' drawn up legs for leverage, and lifted his hips back up to only ease them down once more. Niles' lips parted and he moaned, moaned at Leo's words, at the coy fashion in which he spread his fingers just beneath the retainer's neckline, at the tightness compressing around his length as he developed a slow rhythm, at _everything_.

Niles' hands floundered, wishing to appease the fell beast awakening within him that desired to touch, to claw and draw delicate beads of blood from the alabaster skin pressing against his own as Leo's hips rutted and gyrated hypnotically atop his mount. His hands flitted across the prince's slick thighs, sliding up and dipping into each crease of skin or hiding muscle on their way up his pelvis. He made to fist handfuls of skin at the prince's sides, but his fingers drunkenly curled around only air, only sweat and building moisture. Finally, one of his palms drifted and made to wrap around Leo's length, but a new hand swatted away his grip and for a moment it brought Niles back around, long enough to see Leo snatch up that rejected hand and press it to his chest. 

His senses blurred for a moment, all for his sense of touch. Despite the tension that had steadily built in Niles' very being, his hand on Leo's chest was tender, as though he were handling porcelain. On the other side of that hand, however, beat a heart far more heavy and swift than any capable forging hammer. Leo's heart might as well have been pounding directly against his palm for the power of each pulse. Once Niles regained the use of his other senses, he lifted his gaze to his prince, took in warm glaze that had coated his jasper irises.

It was nearly too much as it was. Niles hoisted the other man forward, forcing Leo's elbows down onto his chest, and bucked up, up into him as though he would never again have the chance to sheath himself inside the prince like this. Leo's breath gradually caught once, then again. Niles gripped the prince's jaw, dragging him close and knocking their foreheads together roughly, if only so he could see his expression as he arched sharply and cried out in climax. It was a lion's roar, proud and pleased, that bled through Leo's eyes as he stared his retainer down in declining orgasm, _daring_ him to try and quiet his howl of delight or stop the shower of his warmth across Niles' abdomen. It was all Niles needed to help him bring himself over the edge. He continued to thrust up into Leo, even after he had finished, captivated by the hazy bliss that had seized the prince's features. His cheeks glowed rosily, his lips parted contently as he murmured words of encouragement with uneven gasps. His breath only began to even out once Niles was throwing back his head, bottoming out desperately and sinking his fingernails into any available skin as he came into Leo.

They lay in a hot bundle upon the cot for what seemed like years, the prince still and quiet with his face tucked into the crook of Niles' neck, heating his skin with his slowing breath. When Leo finally raised his head, he moved off of the retainer to only collapse back onto the cot on his side. Niles took his time rising to his feet and searching the tent for a cloth to clean them both up. When he returned, Leo was now sitting up, staring at the tent wall with a still-dazed expression.

"Perhaps this is because of the coitus," he began, accepting the cloth when Niles offered it to him, "but I feel strangely compelled to tell you that I love you." His face immediately soured at the words as though he had just taken a bitter draft. "Ugh, even the thought makes me cringe." Leo wiped himself clean, unaware of the sunny expression that had creeped upon Niles' lips.

"How very unlike you, Leo," he teased. He had no room to talk, of course. He was smiling like an idiotic youth at his lover as he cleaned himself of sweat and seed. As Leo gestured to hand over the cloth, he caught a glimpse of that expression, and chuckled.

"Can the 'I love you' be unspoken for now?" he asked with a smirk as Niles reddened subtly and began wiping himself off. "Especially since I seem to see one in your eyes as well."

"I think I'd actually prefer that," Niles admitted. "I'm sure we can practice cuddling and pillow talk after the war ends."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to make a lion joke at some point in this fic. I am truly sorry. (not sorry)  
> Sorry for the long pause in this story! I'm currently working six days a week and its hard to find time to write as much as I'd like. I'm not giving up on this story, though!


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